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Old 05-04-2006, 02:16:43   #1
Greg W
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Do you keep a dairy?

If so, does milking the cows put you off wanking?
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Old 05-04-2006, 04:35:43   #2
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I would hope they wouldn't be related at all...

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Old 05-04-2006, 07:38:07   #3
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Old 05-04-2006, 07:40:50   #4
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I have never even seen a cow up close.
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Old 05-04-2006, 08:19:50   #5
Greg W
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Quote:
Originally posted by JM^3
I would hope they wouldn't be related at all...

JM
Similar motion. One would imagine you'd get tired of it after doing it all morning.

I dunno, you're the expert, do you get tired of wanking all morning?
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Old 05-04-2006, 08:25:56   #6
JM^3
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the only limitations are:

when your eyes start to hurt (this limits number of times in one day)

when your balls start to ache (this limits number of times in a week or so)

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Old 05-04-2006, 08:40:05   #7
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Urghhhh.
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Old 05-04-2006, 08:41:07   #8
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^ He just came
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Old 05-04-2006, 08:46:20   #9
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A mate and I once weaved through a field of cows while hurtling downhill on a bmx without any brakes. I was impressed by how unperturbed they were.
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i check my hair at the elevator mirror and the highlight of my day when I say hi to a girl who's opposite of the elevator door at my floor. the one i went out with.
after that, it's the same old fucking thing all over again.
-paiktis
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Old 05-04-2006, 08:50:16   #10
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Maybe they didn't understand that you had no brakes.
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Old 05-04-2006, 08:50:54   #11
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or they thought that riding a bmx is for kids.
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Old 05-04-2006, 09:08:18   #12
King_Ghidra
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i must have missed that bit on the instructions
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i check my hair at the elevator mirror and the highlight of my day when I say hi to a girl who's opposite of the elevator door at my floor. the one i went out with.
after that, it's the same old fucking thing all over again.
-paiktis
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Old 05-04-2006, 10:28:26   #13
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Quote:
Originally posted by Funko
^ He just came


I can do a very good impersonation of a cow mooing. Did it in the country a while back, and the cows all stopped to look at me. Mind oyu, they could have just been thinking "who's the idiot"?
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Old 05-04-2006, 11:19:48   #14
King_Ghidra
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it's scary either way

ever see nursey in the cow fancy dress in blackadder 2? she did a good cow impression too.

Quote:
Dear Queen, I, evil Prince Ludwig the Indestructible, have your two friends and you must choose between them. The ransom is one million Crona. Many many a- po'-lo'-gies for the inconvience.

[In the Queen's Chambre]

Queenie: What a difficult choice!

Nursie: But not the first difficult choice you've ever had to make, my little tadpole.

Queenie: No, that's true.

Nursie: In the old days, it was all difficult choices. Should you have 'Nursie milk' or 'more cow milk'. Or course, it was always 'Nursey milk', ha-ha, but then left breasty-dumpling or right breasty-dumpling. Of course, it was always both breast-dumplings, ha-ha. Ahh, but then which one first.

Queenie: Shut up, Nursey!
Quote:
Queenie: Don't be silly, Nursie. You always talk like this and you always end up coming as the same thing.

Nursie: Do I?

Queenie: Yes, you know it, every...bod..(stops short in mid-sentence) Nursie. What does Nursie always come to fancy dress parties dressed as?

Baldrick: I thought everybody knew.

Queenie: Yes, everybody in public (?), except Nursey.

Baldrick: She always comes as a cow.

Nursie: Yes, that's right. A lovely lovely cow with great big lovely udders. Swiggling 'round going 'Mmmooooo'. Come to Nursey cow, you lovely little heifers. Oh that's more fun..oh, let me be a cow again, please?

Queenie: Shut up. (to Percy) Isn't Nursie stupid?
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i check my hair at the elevator mirror and the highlight of my day when I say hi to a girl who's opposite of the elevator door at my floor. the one i went out with.
after that, it's the same old fucking thing all over again.
-paiktis
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Old 05-04-2006, 11:34:00   #15
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Probably, though I can't rmeember it right now. Damn cold.
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Old 05-04-2006, 11:35:02   #16
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Quote:
Originally posted by Funko
^ He just came
Yes, but at least you were gentle.
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Old 05-04-2006, 11:36:24   #17
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As gentle as a farmer stroking a cow's udder.
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Old 05-04-2006, 11:36:24   #18
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what's wrong wizzz kitsuki, are you in the wank-fase? or is it just because it is spring
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Old 05-04-2006, 11:36:58   #19
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Or he just has a thing for Funko wanking him off.
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Old 05-04-2006, 11:44:38   #20
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Ok, I'm going to stop posting in any threads with any reference or potential referencing to masturbation. Ie. Leaving Forever.
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Old 05-04-2006, 11:47:47   #21
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Yep, stopping posting in those threads would mean leaving forever. Maybe we should call the site Counterwank: a site for alternative views on masturbation and other important things in life.
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Old 05-04-2006, 12:29:27   #22
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sorry

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Old 05-04-2006, 17:48:06   #23
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Quote:
Originally posted by Greg W
Yep, stopping posting in those threads would mean leaving forever. Maybe we should call the site Counterwank: a site for alternative views on masturbation and other important things in life.
I wonder how many alternative views there are on it?
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Old 05-04-2006, 19:59:42   #24
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have you ever met anyone who claimed never to wank? I have.
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Old 05-04-2006, 21:48:58   #25
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hey you'll be keeping a dairy in your norks soon enough
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i check my hair at the elevator mirror and the highlight of my day when I say hi to a girl who's opposite of the elevator door at my floor. the one i went out with.
after that, it's the same old fucking thing all over again.
-paiktis
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Old 06-04-2006, 00:03:36   #26
Greg W
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If a man claims to have never wanked, he's a liar!

FACT!
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Old 06-04-2006, 00:26:57   #27
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I know a guy who didn't wank until he was ~25

wanks all the time now though

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Old 06-04-2006, 01:27:29   #28
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Jon, you have far too much wanking in your life! You should toss that out right now.
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Old 06-04-2006, 02:03:38   #29
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JM should change his name to the Wankmeister.
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Old 06-04-2006, 02:28:34   #30
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Quote:
Originally posted by Greg W
Jon, you have far too much wanking in your life! You should toss that out right now.
I have had too much wanking in my life....

I ready to go pro

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Old 06-04-2006, 03:58:38   #31
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Didn't think they paid for that anymore...
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Old 06-04-2006, 04:09:40   #32
JM^3
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well, isn't wanking just practice? being with another person is the real deal?

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Old 06-04-2006, 04:12:19   #33
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It doesn't, er, work quite the same, no.
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Old 06-04-2006, 07:02:22   #34
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