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Old 01-04-2005, 11:04:17   #1
Oerdin
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How fucked up are the Dutch?

Look at this Dutch shitter. There is a shelf where the turd just sits stinking up the place until you flush and if you have a really long turd it might just bottom out before you finish. At least in America our turds drop into water so the smell is partially negated while the evil Dutch try to pollute the world with there nasty turd smells.
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Old 01-04-2005, 11:13:38   #2
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Is that typically dutch? Unfortunately I don't have one like that at home. It's great for inspecting your droppings before flushing.
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Old 01-04-2005, 11:18:37   #3
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Yes they are awesome, you can poop the alphabet and inspect the little dot on the i.

I hate it when my turd directly falls inwater and splashes my butt.

And our turds don't stink, they smell after tullips and all.
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Old 01-04-2005, 11:42:33   #4
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Downside to this one is when you make a really long one, it slides sideways down your cheeks, smearing them outside the usual range.
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Old 01-04-2005, 11:44:31   #5
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and that is NOT good?
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Old 01-04-2005, 11:50:55   #6
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Quote:
Originally posted by miester gandertak

I hate it when my turd directly falls inwater and splashes my butt.
Ditto.

Mr. G, give these nasty americans a lesson in shitting please.

Or publish a book: "Schjjjtting, the Djutsch wajj"
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Old 01-04-2005, 12:00:41   #7
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hmmmm that's a thought.
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Old 01-04-2005, 12:11:56   #8
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I dislike the fact that the bowl is always so short that the family jewels 'want' to make contact with the front

As for splashing, is that worse than stinking the place out with tulips ? If so, should've gone for the Earth, rather than the Water Closet.
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Old 01-04-2005, 12:27:37   #9
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Quote:
Originally posted by Gary

As for splashing, is that worse than stinking the place out with tulips ?
Of course it is. The turd doesn't remain there for hours you know..

And there is nothing that makes you more happy than that mellifluous voice singing "doo di dooooo" when you flush a ducth wc. Try it.
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Old 01-04-2005, 12:29:03   #10
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inderdeed
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Old 01-04-2005, 12:30:12   #11
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The splash doesn't remain there for hours either. I know what might linger for a while though.
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Old 01-04-2005, 12:34:30   #12
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this one is brilliant.
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Old 01-04-2005, 12:52:59   #13
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That one doesn't shit very well.
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Old 01-04-2005, 13:36:59   #14
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It's ok after a curry though.
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Old 01-04-2005, 13:42:44   #15
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As long as you hit the fly.
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Old 03-04-2005, 18:11:51   #16
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That is a fly isn't it?
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Old 03-04-2005, 19:56:51   #17
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jep, painted in the ceramique.
brilliant Dutch Design.
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Old 03-04-2005, 19:56:54   #18
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Wouldn't that leave shitmarks on the porcelain that you would have to scrub off every time you 'purged'?
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Old 03-04-2005, 20:01:51   #19
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Old 03-04-2005, 21:11:14   #20
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Quote:
Originally posted by Gary
The splash doesn't remain there for hours either. I know what might linger for a while though.
The skid marks down the side of the bowl? The Tulip fragrance?
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Old 03-04-2005, 21:15:51   #21
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Quote:
Originally posted by Oerdin
That is a fly isn't it?
It is. it's supposed to make men aim at the fly, instead of outside the urinoir.
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Old 03-04-2005, 22:28:13   #22
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Quote:
Originally posted by Drekkus
It is. it's supposed to make men aim at the fly, instead of outside the urinoir.
I see, so it's common practice to aim outside the urinor if not for the fly?
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Old 03-04-2005, 22:31:23   #23
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always when we see a fly we tried to piss it on the head.
old dutch tradition
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Old 03-04-2005, 23:21:30   #24
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Those sneaky Dutch.
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Old 04-04-2005, 10:20:12   #25
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yep, better known as the pissing-flyhead-people.
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Last edited by miester gandertak; 04-04-2005 at 10:24:25.
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Old 04-04-2005, 19:47:10   #26
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Quote:
Originally posted by miester gandertak
no
Ah, so Dutch turds are really greasy?
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Old 04-04-2005, 19:49:46   #27
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Old 04-04-2005, 19:54:15   #28
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Can you say anything other than 'no'?
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Old 04-04-2005, 19:55:05   #29
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Yes he can.
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Old 05-04-2005, 03:44:15   #30
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doooooo
di
dooooooooo
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Old 05-04-2005, 04:06:57   #31
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It occurs to me that maybe the Dutch aren't fucked up, they're just backwards, in that they sit facing the back of the toilet when they take a dump.

Whatever, it's still a weird toilet.
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Old 05-04-2005, 04:39:18   #32
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Russians have bogs like that too.
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Old 05-04-2005, 10:13:27   #33
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The Russians took after the Dutch?
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Old 05-04-2005, 10:20:39   #34
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Quote:
Originally posted by Qaj the Fuzzy Love Worm
It occurs to me that maybe the Dutch aren't fucked up, they're just backwards, in that they sit facing the back of the toilet when they take a dump.

Whatever, it's still a weird toilet.
facing the back of the toilet? you meant the front
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Old 05-04-2005, 10:51:31   #35
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Quote:
Originally posted by miester gandertak
Yes they are awesome, you can poop the alphabet and inspect the little dot on the i.

I hate it when my turd directly falls inwater and splashes my butt.
what a shitty thread

I admit that inspecting your dejections should be good and responsible practice, but I wonder how many actually force themselves to that, and how that is country and education dependent.
I think I found the "shelved" model in Germany, and in France too. I thought it was a Jap invention tho.

Personally, I go by perceiving consistence an texture as I extrude.
And when in shared facilities (i.e. in shared hotel roomzm...) I even flush as soon as it drops, if not even ablink earlier.

Regarding the dreaded backsplash, you might consider that:
- it's much less dreaded if you avoid to piss before and drop the turnd in your piss...
- it's a matter of aim: yes, you can aim with your butt too!
- it's EASILY solved by dropping a few wads of paper in the toilet BEFOREHAND.

On a final note that will surely thrill you all, since when I had to begin eating properly (vegetables, fibers and all), considering that more often than not I don't have the patience in the morning and postpone it till nature is ready with the impulse, my turds sometime hit the bottom even with the straightdown model! On the shelved ones, I'd probably end to sit on my own shit! If that's civilisation.....
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Old 05-04-2005, 10:56:21   #36
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more detail than required there mose...
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Old 05-04-2005, 10:56:26   #37
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Quote:
Originally posted by MoSe

- it's EASILY solved by dropping a few wads of paper in the toilet BEFOREHAND.
wiping your ass with wet shitty paper, only stupid italians can think of that.
How in gods name can you clean your butt with paper that is already filthy, and while you wipe the paper will break because it's wet.
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Old 05-04-2005, 10:57:24   #38
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more detail than required there mose...
that was mere retaliation!
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Old 05-04-2005, 10:59:35   #39
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mr.g, I never said you'd pick up that anti-splash paper again
only stupid dutch would think of that
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Old 05-04-2005, 11:01:09   #40
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Old 05-04-2005, 11:40:21   #41
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Quote:
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The Russians took after the Dutch?
St Petersburg was modelled after Amsterdam, by dutch architects.
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Old 05-04-2005, 11:42:42   #42
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Actually, IIRC many of the fancy buildings were built by Italian architects (but then what do I know, this is 3rd hand TV art culture...)
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Old 05-04-2005, 14:45:09   #43
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Quote:
Originally posted by miester gandertak
facing the back of the toilet? you meant the front
The front of the cistern, the back of the seat.
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Old 06-04-2005, 01:57:32   #44
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Old 06-04-2005, 01:59:26   #45
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At least someone hasn't linked the rate my poo site yet.
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Old 06-04-2005, 02:13:20   #46
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Well, not in this thread.
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Old 06-04-2005, 02:26:46   #47
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"Continental style", we call it. I've used plenty of them with never a problem.

I guess the design is there to take a good look at your dump and make sure that it's normal.

Alternatively, it's convenient for recovering your stash from.

They do have one benefit - they are easier to clean.
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Old 06-04-2005, 02:34:03   #48
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Cos wanting to look at your poo is a good, normal, level headed thing.
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Old 06-04-2005, 08:42:50   #49
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And you have to keep records just in case the poo inspector comes by.
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Old 06-04-2005, 10:53:46   #50
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Quote:
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"Continental style", we call it. I've used plenty of them with never a problem.

I guess the design is there to take a good look at your dump and make sure that it's normal.

Alternatively, it's convenient for recovering your stash from.

They do have one benefit - they are easier to clean.
And they don't splash your arse when you take a big dump. You know, when a single drop of water jumps up and hits you right in the hole, just before it's fully closed again.
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