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Old 01-02-2005, 10:24:34   #1
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Which shop (UK) should I use for my Wedding List?

Gotta do one of those lists for our guests to choose our wedding gifts from. The gf is quite a Debenhams fan but I've always seen that place as pretending to be more upmarket than it really is. I'm leaning more towards M&S or possibly John Lewis (although her family arent exactly loaded so the last one may be taking the piss slightly).

Has anyone done this sort of thing before? (either as the marrying couple or the person selecting from the list)
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Old 01-02-2005, 10:25:59   #2
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Old 01-02-2005, 10:26:46   #3
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As a Guest - Debenhams.

It was great. All online. Took about a minute.
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Old 01-02-2005, 10:33:34   #4
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John Lewis - my mates did it and it was very easy to use when i bought them some knives or something off of it - again, online.
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Old 01-02-2005, 10:33:44   #5
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It was great. All online. Took about a minute.
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Old 01-02-2005, 10:44:13   #6
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This British "wedding list" practice just seems so unimaginative, callous and incredibly dull to my ears- what happened to the idea of giving presents out of the goodness of your heart that you like and think will fit the reciever?

Sorry.
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Old 01-02-2005, 10:52:01   #7
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Scabby, I agree with that in some ways.

There is a historical practical purpose. The ideas is that the couple will be setting up home for the first time and the list is a list of practical stuff they need like toasters and cutlery. The idea of the list is to make sure they get what they need and not 100 toasters.

I think these days with people marrying later and living away from home or together more before they marry it's less relevant but still useful.
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Old 01-02-2005, 10:56:11   #8
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I think if anything it's even more relevant and useful these days, as people are more likely to already have things they need, for the resaons you've given.
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Old 01-02-2005, 10:56:14   #9
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Old 01-02-2005, 11:00:40   #10
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Originally posted by Funkodrom
Scabby, I agree with that in some ways.

There is a historical practical purpose. The ideas is that the couple will be setting up home for the first time and the list is a list of practical stuff they need like toasters and cutlery. The idea of the list is to make sure they get what they need and not 100 toasters.

I think these days with people marrying later and living away from home or together more before they marry it's less relevant but still useful.

Yeah, but also we dont trust our (older) relatives to exercise decent taste when choosing stuff for us - we could end up with some real nasty stuff if we arent careful.

I like the idea of guests being able to do stuff online - more chance of them making the effort then. Debenhams and JL in the lead so far then.
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Old 01-02-2005, 11:01:45   #11
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I think if anything it's even more relevant and useful these days, as people are more likely to already have things they need, for the resaons you've given.
Yeah... good point.
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Old 01-02-2005, 11:06:49   #12
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Quote:
Originally posted by Scabrous Birdseed
This British "wedding" practice just seems so unimaginative, callous and incredibly dull to my ears
i'm sure this is what you meant to say
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after that, it's the same old fucking thing all over again.
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Old 01-02-2005, 11:12:17   #13
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I have chosen from a store list. Not on line, before the Net was that ubiquitous, but I went to M&S and sorted it in the store.

It was ok, I guess, certainly shortened the time taken. But I wasn't that keen. I know that the alternative was to read though a couple's hand written list and risk duplication, but somehow it seemed so mechanical.

Besides whilst it ensures you get what the couple wants, it also means that you pay the prices that the couple has dictated. (And doesn't the store add on a bit for the privilege ? Too long ago to recall now, but I think they might.)

And getting there after all the others have already snapped up the reasonably priced items, is a pain too. And it's all so restrictive.

In fact I'm a little off about a list in the first place to be honest. Over time it's gone from, being happy with whatever's given, to a suggestion list, as it's sensible to avoid getting gifts that are unwanted. Which seems reasonable except that it moves in the direction of dictating what other will give. Then on to the store listings, as it's sensible to actually define the gift and avoid getting two of the same, except that, that is even further into dictating what's bought, and what's paid for it.

A gift ought not be demanded really, but gratefully received as a nice 'surprise' that wasn't a necessity but a wonderful gesture from friends and family. Sadly the emphasis has been changed over time by the couples in collusion with commercial interests.

But given that that's the way things have gone, I think, if possible, it may be an idea to have a combination. A paper handout with suggestions for those who wish to give something, and maybe a couple of stores running lists. Although it won't get rid of the possible duplication problem, I think that's a small price to pay for the freedom of the giver to go elsewhere without feeling guilty about it. After all things wear out so a duplication isn't that much of a problem.
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Old 01-02-2005, 11:15:33   #14
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Yeah, but also we don't trust our (older) relatives to exercise decent taste when choosing stuff for us - we could end up with some real nasty stuff if we aren't careful.

This is the problem. Couples think they are entitled rather than privileged.

I like the idea of guests being able to do stuff online - more chance of them making the effort then.

I'd have thought the whole idea of the Net was to make less effort. Unless you're one of the (older) relatives who don't know a PC from a dishwasher.
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Old 01-02-2005, 11:16:16   #15
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Old 01-02-2005, 11:18:30   #16
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'Victoria's Secret' ?
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Old 01-02-2005, 11:21:40   #17
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Old 01-02-2005, 11:21:54   #18
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Quote:
Originally posted by Gary
Yeah, but also we don't trust our (older) relatives to exercise decent taste when choosing stuff for us - we could end up with some real nasty stuff if we aren't careful.

This is the problem. Couples think they are entitled rather than privileged.

I don't think it's that at all.
Couples getting married know people will buy them gifts, that's the way things are done. Maybe not all guests will, but the majority certainly.
That in no way suggests the couple won't appreciate any presents they get. A list is a practical idea though, because it's hard to appreciate 10 toasters!
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Old 01-02-2005, 11:25:54   #19
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See HelloKitty's post above
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Old 01-02-2005, 11:42:54   #20
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The Greeks have the best plan for wedding gifts - everyone gives cash! No complaints, no duplication, no worries
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Old 01-02-2005, 12:23:55   #21
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That's it !!!! A list at Lloyds
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Old 01-02-2005, 12:57:50   #22
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Even with a list/registry you tend to end up with a lot of clocks.
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Old 01-02-2005, 15:35:57   #23
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My mate did John Lewis. If it was me having to buy I'd put the gift list at Matalan
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Old 01-02-2005, 15:39:45   #24
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Did I miss the wedding announcement thread?
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Old 01-02-2005, 15:40:36   #25
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If I get married, my wedding list is going to be at Wong Kei's
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Old 01-02-2005, 15:49:01   #26
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Or the catering for the reception?
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Old 01-02-2005, 15:50:41   #27
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Now that is a good idea
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Old 01-02-2005, 15:57:32   #28
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Old 01-02-2005, 16:00:39   #29
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Hehe, do the wedding toast with sake
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Old 01-02-2005, 16:01:13   #30
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Old 01-02-2005, 16:06:05   #31
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The wedding Sesame Prawn Toast?
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Old 01-02-2005, 16:06:34   #32
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Old 01-02-2005, 16:08:02   #33
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I'm getting very hungry!!!
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Old 01-02-2005, 16:10:22   #34
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Old 01-02-2005, 16:23:02   #35
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Sadly, it's traditional fare. Evening buffet should be good, though.

Not sure on the drinks though - Pimms, Bucks Fizz, Kir Royale or cheap Champers for arriving guests?
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Old 01-02-2005, 16:24:40   #36
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Old 01-02-2005, 16:24:45   #37
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Old 01-02-2005, 16:25:16   #38
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Old 01-02-2005, 16:25:38   #39
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Old 01-02-2005, 16:26:00   #40
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That's that sorted then.
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Old 01-02-2005, 16:26:09   #41
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Good work guys
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Old 01-02-2005, 16:26:57   #42
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Were they all x-posts or did anyone deliberately try and complete the set?
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Old 01-02-2005, 16:28:26   #43
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You can't really go wrong with Bucks Fizz

It isnt what it used to be
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Old 01-02-2005, 16:28:37   #44
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I picked the one I think I'd like the best. I love Champagne but the cheap stuff can be dreadful
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Old 01-02-2005, 16:29:28   #45
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Pimms

My favourite - it's an August wedding so we're hoping (foolishly) for sunshine
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Old 01-02-2005, 16:30:15   #46
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I picked the one I think I'd like the best. I love Champagne but the cheap stuff can be dreadful

Yeah, it's too expensive to lay on goodstuff for 100+ people
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Old 01-02-2005, 16:34:19   #47
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Quote:
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I picked the one I think I'd like the best. I love Champagne but the cheap stuff can be dreadful
I thought he meant good non-French sparkling which is about 1/3 the cost of champagne. Well that's what I'd get if it was that option not Pimms. Lindauer or something. Mmm.
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Old 01-02-2005, 16:37:19   #48
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My favourite - it's an August wedding so we're hoping (foolishly) for sunshine
Yeah, hot summers day, Pimms reception. Great.

Plus it tends to be weaker once mixed and people get less destroyed so early.
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Old 01-02-2005, 16:39:43   #49
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Good call all round
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Old 01-02-2005, 16:46:34   #50
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Originally posted by Scabrous Birdseed
This British "wedding list" practice just seems so unimaginative, callous and incredibly dull to my ears- what happened to the idea of giving presents out of the goodness of your heart that you like and think will fit the reciever?

Sorry.
What do they do in Sweden? Get together for a happy looting party, like in the IKEA adverts?
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