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-   -   Look upon my works, ye mighty, and despair. (http://www.counterglow.com/forum/showthread.php?t=30314)

Lazarus and the Gimp 16-08-2005 17:21:32

Look upon my works, ye mighty, and despair.
 
I'm building a patio. Any predictions on the outcome?

Beta1 16-08-2005 17:23:49

should we alert the emergency services now?

Gramercy Riffs 16-08-2005 17:24:35

I've never been to Bristol, but I imagine it looks like this.

http://www.patiodoorsecure.com/frontpic.jpg

Nills Lagerbaak 16-08-2005 17:28:05

http://www.hotelcasamorisca.com/i/PATIO.jpg ?

Lazarus and the Gimp 16-08-2005 17:28:11

That's the Bristol in Umbria, not the West Country.

Japher 16-08-2005 17:33:35

3 dogs will die
1.6 pints of blood will be spilt
and 3 minor appendages will be lost

Gary 16-08-2005 17:38:37

After a fair bit of cussing and shouting, "Ouch" you'll have a servicable patio area. Just so long as no one walks on it, that is.

Immortal Wombat 16-08-2005 18:02:06

Quote:

Originally posted by Lazarus and the Gimp
I'm building a patio. Any predictions on the outcome?
Nothing beside remains. Round the decay
Of that colossal wreck, boundless and bare
The lone and level garden stretches far away.

MDA 16-08-2005 18:10:03

1 Attachment(s)
An aerial view.

Japher 16-08-2005 18:11:17

needs a water feature

Venom 16-08-2005 18:15:59

The project will be a great success......after it runs over budget by about 3 million dollars.

The Norks 16-08-2005 18:32:54

you will have to be freed from the concrete by three firemen and you will break at least one toe. possibly all ten when you drop a flagstone.

Oh the calamity!

Lazarus and the Gimp 16-08-2005 19:41:53

Current odds-

5/4 Paving slab dropped on foot, toe or finger
2/1 Fall in concrete.
3/1 Pave over some vitally important yet obscure public amenity, or small child.
5/1 Patio ends up resembling a scale model of the Alps
10/1 Fall into the cement mixer
20/1 The scalpings turn out to be a blend of depleted uranium and blue asbestos
50/1 It gets finished.

devilmunchkin 16-08-2005 21:00:42

perhaps..
it will be a patio..like cider is to oerdin's scrumpy?

Greg W 17-08-2005 02:18:21

I've built a patio before. Took me a year. Let's see if you can beat my record. ;)

Oh, end result - it was perfectly serviceable, and still is 5 years later. No subsiding or anything. And it actually looks pretty good too. No major injuries were sustained, and from memory, no minor ones either. The best part was using the diamond tipped saw to cut the pavers. Working with big saws = gud. :)

Koshko 17-08-2005 02:42:46

Patio falls apart crushing everyone on it shortly after it's completed.

Chris 17-08-2005 03:13:09

I predict we will read amusing tails of disaster at your expense.

Funko 17-08-2005 09:10:47

I'm looking forward to the "how do I stop her swearing before her mother comes home" thread.

MoSe 17-08-2005 09:13:55

Quote:

Originally posted by Lazarus and the Gimp
That's the Bristol in Umbria, not the West Country.
Bristol in Umbria??
http://tinyurl.com/8zfan
There's a Bastia there, but not Bristol.
Do you have a villa in central Italy?

Gary 17-08-2005 09:24:27

Quote:

Cuesta de la Victoria, 9
18010 - Granada, Spain
Maybe not Italy :)

MoSe 17-08-2005 09:39:32

Ah,L'Umbria!

Fergus & The Brazen Car 17-08-2005 10:32:57

Self-built patios=

toejam or fingerpaste, produced with slab, brick, hammer or wood.

My advice ? Get the missus to do it, and alphabetize your albums or visit Boscastle instead.

Lazarus and the Gimp 17-08-2005 19:56:30

Quote:

Originally posted by MoSe
Bristol in Umbria??
http://tinyurl.com/8zfan
There's a Bastia there, but not Bristol.
Do you have a villa in central Italy?

I was feebly taking the piss.

Lazarus and the Gimp 17-08-2005 19:57:33

Quote:

Originally posted by Fergus & The Brazen Car

My advice ? Get the missus to do it, and alphabetize your albums or visit Boscastle instead.

When Boscastle flooded, I was just a few miles up the coast. In a tent. That was a scary night.

Gary 17-08-2005 20:08:45

Quote:

Originally posted by Lazarus and the Gimp
I was feebly taking a piss.
Get that prostate looked at !

Lazarus and the Gimp 17-08-2005 20:14:13

Nope. The view's nothing to write home about, so I'll settle for The Finger.

The prostate is a great leveller.

Provost Harrison 17-08-2005 20:33:54

Looking to bury someone annoying under it in a Fred West style? If not, remember, this is your big chance to do so ;)


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