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Venom
22-10-2002, 14:46:42
Medieval Total War review now online.

Check it out here http://www.counterglow.net/article.php?id=mtw or not.

Sean
22-10-2002, 14:56:27
Wot, no screenshots?

Venom
22-10-2002, 14:58:21
No. No screenshots. I'm too lazy to upload any.

Venom
22-10-2002, 14:59:04
Here screenshots to your hearts content.

http://www.totalwar.com/community/medieval/gallery.htm

FunkyFingers
22-10-2002, 15:03:11
I get the impression you thought this game sucked worse than a 2 dollar whore?

Venom
22-10-2002, 15:06:35
Own goal.

Resource Consumer
22-10-2002, 15:12:43
Ouch - I bet Sid is glad you never reviewed SMAC.:)

Venom
22-10-2002, 15:17:37
One day I'll review one of his games. One day.

maroule
22-10-2002, 15:30:38
Venom, as you admitted, you obviously don't jerk off enough.
I bet your ex is still firmly attached to your dick and has been pumping you for 5 years straight now to no effect, except maybe this horrible pain in your testicles, this horrible pain that eats away your brain.

Were there a bit of it remaining, you'd acknowledge the interest of MTW, as a large number of people have. It's about history (the classes you masturbated through) and strategy (no, not 'Super surfing madness' on PS2, Venom). Ejaculate, man, it will do you a world of good. She needs the ego boost too, poor thing.

King_Ghidra
22-10-2002, 15:49:41
:lol: great review :lol:

if only i could get into this fucking shit hole website to actually post a comment on it :mad: :shoot: :bash:

Venom
22-10-2002, 15:50:26
That guy's funny. Can we keep him?

Sean
22-10-2002, 15:51:02
Ah yes, nothing like a weak flame to really spice up a discussion.

King_Ghidra
22-10-2002, 15:52:06
puce card for sean

Venom's Pet Goat
22-10-2002, 15:52:38
Quite what you were doing reviewing a game that needs a woking brain to play properly god only knows. You really are seriously ignorant MTW is the best Strategy game out there and holds weeks of entertainment and hence superb value for money. Just because you don't like the genre in general gives you no right to slag it off. Stick to your no-brain shooty games and shove your ill thought out rubbish up your ****.

Resource Consumer
22-10-2002, 15:52:41
...and that's even nothing like a really weak flame...

boom boom

Resource Consumer
22-10-2002, 15:53:45
Originally posted by Venom's Pet Goat
Quite what you were doing reviewing a game that needs a woking brain to play properly god only knows. You really are seriously ignorant MTW is the best Strategy game out there and holds weeks of entertainment and hence superb value for money. Just because you don't like the genre in general gives you no right to slag it off. Stick to your no-brain shooty games and shove your ill thought out rubbish up your ****.

Hey! Who brought in the censors. I thought we didn't do that here.

BTW, people in Woking have no brains, it's a well known fact.

Sean
22-10-2002, 15:54:43
Originally posted by King_Ghidra
puce card for sean
I’ll have to look that one up.

Funkodrom
22-10-2002, 15:54:44
There is a guy at work who has MTW, he really likes it. I get regular updates at lunchtime about how his quest to conquer Europe as the Danes is going.

Funkodrom
22-10-2002, 15:55:23
Originally posted by Sean
I’ll have to look that one up.

It's for sarcasm.

Sean
22-10-2002, 15:55:49
Originally posted by King_Ghidra
puce card for sean
What?? Referee!! It was an honest challenge!!

Resource Consumer
22-10-2002, 15:56:22
I was really put off by my bad experience with Shogun :TW. It seems from Venom's experience that I will be no happier with this one so I think I'll pass on this game. Good timing, I was in danger of breaking down and buying it.:)

Venom
22-10-2002, 15:56:36
Originally posted by Venom's Pet Goat
Quite what you were doing reviewing a game that needs a woking brain to play properly god only knows. You really are seriously ignorant MTW is the best Strategy game out there and holds weeks of entertainment and hence superb value for money. Just because you don't like the genre in general gives you no right to slag it off. Stick to your no-brain shooty games and shove your ill thought out rubbish up your ****.


A woking brain? Are you sure you have one?

And I happen to love the stragtegy genre in general. I've got a ton of strategy games. I respect the fact you like it. I found it boring as shit. Like homoboy up above said, it's about history and I prefer that it not be. As I said in my review they should have just made it a straight RTS game. That would have been ok.

And yes. I paid for the game, so I can say whatever the fuck I want to about it you piece of shit Nazi wannabe.

And I'd reply to your last sentance but it makes no sense. So shut the fuck up.

Sean
22-10-2002, 16:01:23
Originally posted by Funkodrom
There is a guy at work who has MTW, he really likes it. I get regular updates at lunchtime about how his quest to conquer Europe as the Danes is going.
They beat Luxembourg recently, but struggled to do so.

Resource Consumer
22-10-2002, 16:02:32
Venom, is it possible to play as the Faroe Isles?

Funkodrom
22-10-2002, 16:03:16
For the new posters here is a link to Venom's last RTS review, bit hard to find now in the archive:

http://www.counterglow.net/article.php?id=empireearthreview

Venom
22-10-2002, 16:03:39
Yes RC. Now run back to your friends and get more people to flame me. I want to see them do better.

King_Ghidra
22-10-2002, 16:03:47
Originally posted by Sean
What?? Referee!! It was an honest challenge!!

yes, but very late - a clear puce card

Sean
22-10-2002, 16:05:17
Time for a chorus of The Referee’s a Wanker (from Wanker’s Corner?).

Resource Consumer
22-10-2002, 16:06:55
:o

maroule
22-10-2002, 16:09:38
well, I guess nobody care, my Barbara Streisand loving friends

Resource Consumer
22-10-2002, 16:10:33
Here's the wanker's corner link for those that need it.

http://www.counterglow.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=8169

HARDMAN
22-10-2002, 16:11:11
i shot babra strysand in the cunt

Resource Consumer
22-10-2002, 16:12:51
I wondered when you would show up:(

maroule
22-10-2002, 16:13:13
Originally posted by HARDMAN
i shot babra strysand in the cunt

houuu, bad boy...

Resource Consumer
22-10-2002, 16:14:56
Originally posted by maroule
houuu, bad boy...

You'll have to excuse HARDMAN that is about the extent of his vocabulary.

Funkodrom
22-10-2002, 16:15:49
Aha!

http://www.totalwar.org/ubb/Forum7/HTML/003036.html

Now I see where everyone came from. Hello Totalwar posters!

Venom
22-10-2002, 16:17:20
These guys are gonna be my friends. I can just tell.

Sean
22-10-2002, 16:18:08
Is that the place RC…you know…a while ago?

Resource Consumer
22-10-2002, 16:19:40
ajli@home (yep - but don't mention it)

Sean
22-10-2002, 16:19:43
nothing like an internet slaggin' match, i think we've invented a new sport

Venom
22-10-2002, 16:25:30
He must be 10 or something.

Scabrous Birdseed
22-10-2002, 16:27:39
Sean? I thought he was like 17 or 18 or something along those lines.

Sean
22-10-2002, 16:28:23
See the Googlism thread for the definitve answer.

Thrax
22-10-2002, 16:44:00
HAHAHAHAHA

loved that review.

Got any more Venom? Fuck I laughed my ass off.

I agree with almost everything you said, except for a FEW things...

MTW crashes like a motherfucker.. Its not stable at all. It crashes when you save, when you attack crusades, and other times as well (Not all the time, but just enough to piss you off worse than the annoying girlfriend whining over your shoulder, asking you if her new pink socks look pretty, while trying to snipe that online l33t Mohaa player).

Spies and assassins are cool, but assassins are dumber than my inbred half-tailed crooked eyed mutt of a cat. So are the ships. If you tell an assassin to kill someone originating in the same province, and that bastard takes off during the movement phase, your assassin doesnt carry out his orders. Instead he sits in the province until the next phase, where he will trail the intended victim for the next 20 years.

Ships, oh my god, did they even playtest them? Ever try attacking a ship? 90% of the time, the computer moves his ship away, and the attack does nothing. Even if you have ships with a higher 'movement speed'.

And this patch thats supposed to be coming out. Diddnt the game come out in August? Still no patch? What are those guys at Creative assembly doing? Playing Warcraft 3? They must be, because Warcraft 3 had a patch within the first 2 weeks that solved the major issues, and from the looks of reviews out there, MTW got higher reviews which is bullshit.

I really like the games concept, and the things they intended to do with it, but really... You MTW players out there are only fooling yourselves if you figure this is the greatest strategy game of 2002.

King_Ghidra@home
22-10-2002, 16:58:51
with any luck this will soon be the longest thread ever

Venom
22-10-2002, 17:37:03
It crashes a lot for you? I didn't have that trouble. Doesn't suprise me though.

I've got 3 more reviews out there. Empire Earth, Medal of Honor and Soldier of Fortune 2 (he says self promoting himself).

Venom
22-10-2002, 17:39:58
http://www.counterglow.net/article.php?id=sofii Soldier of Fortune

http://www.counterglow.net/article.php?id=mohaareview Medal of Honor

And Empire Earth
http://www.counterglow.net/article....pireearthreview

DaShi
22-10-2002, 20:36:17

Sir Penguin
22-10-2002, 21:19:12
Hi Guy_Incognito. :D

SP

Shining1
23-10-2002, 02:28:59
Chances are they'll get more entertainment out of defending MTW against it's critics than they will actually playing it.

It's definitely amusing when someone brings up the minimum brain requirement for a game and then refers to 'shooty' games:).

Darkstar
23-10-2002, 02:42:22
Poor Venom!

Venom is a strategy and sports game player. He loves RTS, likes TBS, and goes wacky over certain sports games.

Venom, thanks for the review. I had looked at MTW in the stores, and had considered picking it up for a weekend tour. Now, I'll let it wait until the bargain bin.

The only people that have a reason to flame like that.... are the people making money off the game. I'll presume those two morons are exactly that.

Management... how about a section for contributors? Listing all their reviews/articles maybe?

fastspawn
23-10-2002, 04:59:42
reminds me off a somethingawful trutmedia review

Darkstar
23-10-2002, 05:35:41
Googlism says:

medieval total war is here
medieval total war is a upgrade of original shogun
medieval total war is grand in scale and purpose
medieval total war is a chess match featuring solid strategic battle elements
medieval total war is the unit status indicator that tells you how your men are feeling
medieval total war is "total letdown"
medieval total war is de opvolger van shogun total war
medieval total war is gold
medieval total war is goud

Stalins Organ
23-10-2002, 06:51:00
Interesting review - there's just oen thing wrong with it - you said the game isn't buggy, so it seems pretty clear that you never bothered to play it....or at most you played a turn or too, decided it was actually something you might have to think about rather than point and shoot, and then gave up.

Surely you're not going to suggest to us that CA have published a game that doesn't require patching up[on release?? Nah - you couldn't be that stupid...yet....yes...I thought so - you said it isn't buggy.....oh dear.....and I was so hoping to be able to take you seriously.

Oh well......never mind - there'll always be bucket loads of FPS's for you to go enjoy, so please do - ASAP.

Darkstar
23-10-2002, 07:16:05
Hey, you guys haven't insulted his ancestory. What's wrong with you? You too scared? Surely any of the comments you heard today about your ancestory would do. Just mimic that back.

These guys are a real hoot. :D

Rosacrux goes medieval
23-10-2002, 07:27:55
When (*if*) that venom character gets to enjoy a not-paid-for blowjob, he might change his views, style, behaviour, attitude and some other not so pleasant things, coming forward off that puke he likes to call a review.

Well, sugarpops, I am quite sure you can have a heck of a time playing some no-brains-involved FPS online, count endless frags and involve in some sort of highly spiritual conversation with your teammates, in the context of "heya dude, seen da frag, man? Kikz'azz Imtellingya".

But I am not quite sure why don't you stick to it and rather go out and post a pile of puke that is trying to simulate a game review... probably you are tired of wanking with your hands and tried to do so with your mind, huh? Well, it's a handjob anyway.

cheers :smoke:

Darkstar
23-10-2002, 07:36:53
Another drive by spunkaspam. Amazing.

Any game that has that many wankers show up and scream you are wrong are just culties looking for Dr. Moon to come by personally and give their life direction.

Word of advice for the bukkake wantabee participants... Sciencetology. Try it. You'll love it.

ShadeWraith
23-10-2002, 07:48:57
Like some of the previous posters in this thread I have played the TW series of games for a while now. Although I wouldnt be so blinkered to refuse to acknowledge the games have their faults (some more significant than others) on the whole they have been received by press and public alike quite warmly. Your "review" could have been quite interesting as its usually quite enlightening to listen to an objective opinion, however I found it pretty dissapointing. As an exercise in trying to project an image of a d00d with a 'tude it was quite exemplary unfortunately it failed in its primary objective which I am assuming was to give an informed objective opinion of a game to prospective purchasers. I fail to see the relevance of blowjobs and crack ho's to a mediaeval strategy game I'm presuming you referenced them to try to add a little "colour" to your review. Personally I would try to make the actual review more interesting then you wouldnt have to use spurious references to bj's and ho's to garner the readers interest. Good luck with your future reviews although I must admit I dont believe your opinion of the game reflects the relative worth of MTW in any shape or form, but as the old saying goes opinions are like arseholes...everybody has one

:p


Wraith

Darkstar
23-10-2002, 07:50:29
Well, guys, you are all fun... but... time for something serious.

This is Counter Glow. You are welcome to stick around and write some articles and reviews for this place. Including one on Medieval: Total War, if you want. If you want to write what you think is a better/more accurate review of the game, you are welcome to. Management will most likely post it.

maroule
23-10-2002, 07:51:13
Originally posted by Darkstar

The only people that have a reason to flame like that.... are the people making money off the game. I'll presume those two morons are exactly that.



sure, and the US government is hiding ETs from us. Before seeing big business conspirations everywhere, think why Venom's review could be irritating : it's an historical game covering a period almost ignored in other strat/tactic games, allowing you to play factions like Bizantium that are completely unique, under a battle engine that might not be brand new but pulled a strong fan base since Shogun. That's bound to interest some people, like myself. Instead of addressing that, Venom elaborated more than half his time on his botched blow job. Now, don't get me wrong, I find blow jobs stories fascinating, and it still figures in my top 10 topic list. But the historic angle, the possibility to play the spanish reconquista, the fall of Constantinopolis, Saladin's Jihad, the Seljud's push towards the balkans, the 100 years war between France and England, etc.... That you fail to grasp it could be of interest, elicit this kind of answer and still label people 'moronic' is a mystery. :hmm

Now if CA wants to pay me for flaming, why not mixing business and pleasure. But frankly I doubt they notice.

King_Ghidra
23-10-2002, 07:55:11
Originally posted by King_Ghidra@home
with any luck this will soon be the longest thread ever

things are proceeding to plan so far...

Darkstar
23-10-2002, 08:01:23
Maroule, why would any *fan* of the game be flaming a moron that obviously doesn't get *it*? When he (or she) could be playing the game? The only answer that really makes sense to that is that you are at work/school, and since you cannot play the game, you are talking about it. Are you at work? At school? If not... why worry about it?

You are not participating in the MTW community. You are flaming someone of another community. That's just harassment. And here, it's pointless. Unless you plan on joining the community? That's the only way we will take you serious. Unless you are worried about the casual reader that passes by this site? If so... they won't bother reading your comments. Not most of them, anyways. Those that do read the comments will think Venom is write. 2 supporters from MTW who said all of that and the bugs! Just a few crazed flamers saying otherwise, and they are mad someone pee'd on their parade.

Darkstar
23-10-2002, 08:22:12
Oh... and they are morons because all they do is flame Venom for saying something they don't like. No real counterpoint to his article. I particularly like Venom being flamed because he didn't come down hard enough on the game. What with no mention of the bugs and crashes, etc. And that's from both supporters and not. That's too funny.

It's getting late for me, so I'll be bowing out. Unlike other places, Counter Glow really does accept and post/publish (whatever you want to call it) articles and reviews from it's members. Think it over.

This place has a strong core group of die hard gamers... long time grogs, lighter war gamers, history fans, you name it. We range from serious Diplomacy and Supremecy fans to caffiene freaks playing twitch/click/twitch/click to Gitaroo. Venom isn't a light weight, despite the impressions people may have made by a single read. Sometimes, people really don't get a game. That happens. Sometimes, even though it's 'your' kind of game, 'you' just don't like it. That happens.

So for those of you flaming in... write up a real piece about MTW. And send it submissions@counterglow.net. If there is anything more then a general 'you guys suck' to it, Management will probably put it up on this site.

maroule
23-10-2002, 10:01:59
Originally posted by Darkstar
Maroule, why would any *fan* of the game be flaming a moron that obviously doesn't get *it*? When he (or she) could be playing the game? The only answer that really makes sense to that is that you are at work/school, and since you cannot play the game, you are talking about it. Are you at work? At school? If not... why worry about it?

You are not participating in the MTW community. You are flaming someone of another community. That's just harassment. And here, it's pointless. Unless you plan on joining the community? That's the only way we will take you serious. Unless you are worried about the casual reader that passes by this site? If so... they won't bother reading your comments. Not most of them, anyways. Those that do read the comments will think Venom is write. 2 supporters from MTW who said all of that and the bugs! Just a few crazed flamers saying otherwise, and they are mad someone pee'd on their parade.


buckets of nonsense, but lets go
1/ of course I'm at work, of course I play and don't post when I'm at home
2/ "contradictory opinions are harrasment, and why bother debating". Great philosophy for a forum.
3/ the game is unstable on some systems (not on all, and not on mine) and Venom didn't like his last blow job. So what? The game is still extremely good, but not for everybody. Those not interested in a strong historic angle will find it boring. That's a basic point. Why was it not made? Why don't you bother responding to my last point (which other game allow you to play this period is such detail)? Both answers are ; plain laziness, general irrelevance of the review or of your points.

Anyway, I agree I'm just passing, the general level of the forum is not encouraging me to stay.

King_Ghidra
23-10-2002, 10:09:52
from what i saw, venom doesn't like the game because he believes it is poorly designed and executed, not because it is a historical war simulation.

so far none of you mtw fans who have come here have succeeded or even made much of an attempt to explain why it is a good game apart from the fact that it is a historical war sim.

there are loads of historical war sims out there so why should i play this one? venom gave his opinion, what's yours?

maroule
23-10-2002, 10:29:07
[i]
there are loads of historical war sims out there so why should i play this one? [/B]

which ones? Cossak, AofEmpires? I have not seen ONE that used units of 10 to 100 people as the base of the simulation,
in AoE you 'simulate' battle by having groups of 30 people nagging at each other. Fun, but no simulation. Which other engine reproduces the concepts of battle lines, flanking, skirmishing?

you'll have problems finding a single one on the period. The closest is Sid's gettysburg engine, and you'll have noticed it's not exactly medieval.

As for explaining why I like the game, I'm not, unlike some previous patron thought, a representative of CA and couldn't care less if you play/like the game or not. I (and countless other people, watch the sales charts) just do for obvious reasons (campaign part, interaction of prod and military aspects, generals, religion factor, specific units per province/faction, etc.) that escaped your reviewer.

Thrax
23-10-2002, 10:33:31
Like I said before, great concept for a game, poorly executed.

When I first started playing MTW I had high hopes. I thought the combination of RTS, RPG and TBS would bring this game to a new standard of strategy gaming. It fell short. There are too many 'why did they do thats' and 'what the fuck were they thinking when they programmed thats' to give this game any much higher of a rating than what Venom gave.

I gave the game a chance. I played it for nearly a week. I put aside the un-interesting closeup 3d battle displays, and the quirky general/age/king/v&v's and tried to do serious strategy gaming like I enjoy to do.

But all I ended up with was a saved game that no longer can be played, a game that is SO LINEAR you cant even play campaigns over the internet, and 2 fucking gigs of wasted space on my hard drive.

And as for Venoms review, those of you that diddnt even get a chuckle off of it, get a fucking life.

King_Ghidra
23-10-2002, 10:39:09
Originally posted by maroule
your reviewer.

christ, he's nothing to do with me - 'the opinions expressed by venom do not represent those of other counterglow users...' or something.

Anyway, i have a copy of the game and i quite like it. In fact i was the guy who recommended giving it a go to everyone else here (on the basis of enjoying the original).

Funkodrom
23-10-2002, 10:43:27
I never tried Shogun: Total War 'cause of all the problems people had getting it to run. The Shaker has basically the same make and model of PC as me and he had a nightmare with it. Problems with Athlons with GeForce2s or something I think.

Funkodrom
23-10-2002, 10:44:41
And yes, reviews here are the personal views of the reviewer. With the Warcraft III review Shiny and I wrote it together 'cause we both had different views of the game.

http://www.counterglow.net/article.php?id=warcraft3

ShadeWraith
23-10-2002, 11:44:36
I dont have a problem with people holding a contrary opinion to my own. Discussions such as this are relatively futile...no matter how eloquent or persuasive the pro MTW camps arguments are, is Venom going to hold up his hands and say ok you are right the game is magnificent? I dont think so....my major problem is not the diversity of opinion just that I dont think it was a particularly good review.


Wraith

Venom
23-10-2002, 11:47:35
Did some lifeless dork dare use "d00d" in reference to me?

You don't know shit about me. Which is why you look like such a moron trying to insult me. But feel free to keep on defending a piece of shit game and limply flaming me. I love the attention.

Venom
23-10-2002, 11:48:07
Originally posted by ShadeWraith
I dont have a problem with people holding a contrary opinion to my own. Discussions such as this are relatively futile...no matter how eloquent or persuasive the pro MTW camps arguments are, is Venom going to hold up his hands and say ok you are right the game is magnificent? I dont think so....my major problem is not the diversity of opinion just that I dont think it was a particularly good review.


Wraith

Now that I can appreciate.

Venom
23-10-2002, 11:55:17
Originally posted by Stalins Organ
Interesting review - there's just oen thing wrong with it - you said the game isn't buggy, so it seems pretty clear that you never bothered to play it


I played over 300 turns and I never had a single crash or anything. It was fine for me. Now if your hunk of shit computer can't run it that's your problem. Or Darkstars. And please, nerdily spout your awesome PC specs to me and see if I give a shit. Your machine couldn't run it. Mine did fine. Relax and live with it tool.

MDA
23-10-2002, 13:24:50
Originally posted by maroule
Those not interested in a strong historic angle will find it boring.

Imagine buying the game because you had an interest in the historic angle, but ending up hating the game because its so poorly put together. Bummer.

Venom
23-10-2002, 13:31:56
And for those idiots who can't form a coherent arguement to save their lives...do you really think I'd shell out 42 bucks of my own money on a game and genre that I knew I didn't like? You're fucking retarded if you think that. I wanted to like the game. I had heard good things about the game. I played this game 100 turns longer than it deserved to be played just in case I was missing something. It's just so boring and linear.

maroule
23-10-2002, 14:00:50
Originally posted by MDA
Imagine buying the game because you had an interest in the historic angle, but ending up hating the game because its so poorly put together. Bummer.


but frankly it's not. There are flaws (mainly the AI could use a lot of improvements, as the diplomatic section, which should copy the one from Europa Universalis) but frankly IMO it does not detract from the game IF you get a kick with the idea of attacking janissaries with kataphractoi (biz heavy cavalry) and Nafta throwers. In that case, the unit variety gives it a non linear style of play, as Venom had to concede :
"In all fairness though there are a good number of options for your army so you can strategize about how best to fight. "

Anyway. This review was the Wimb.FC of MTW reviews, bad attitude for the show, swear mouth, often funny, but ultimately boring long ball style/no refinment.

I know, that's a low blow


:shoot:

King_Ghidra
23-10-2002, 14:05:00
to venom that's a very highbrow blow

normally people finish off by calling him a fucking illiterate arsehole fag or something

sorry about my 'swear mouth'

Venom
23-10-2002, 14:12:30
You have a potty mouth arsehole fag!

maroule
23-10-2002, 14:18:35
Originally posted by Venom
You have a potty mouth arsehole fag!

hou, Venom, you're hurting my feelings

King_Ghidra
23-10-2002, 14:22:06
i think he meant me asshole bitch twat

Venom
23-10-2002, 14:22:19
I wasn't talking to you you facist hypocrit. I was talking to KG.

maroule
23-10-2002, 14:24:55
well, since nobody takes me seriously, I'll pout and sulk

Resource Consumer
23-10-2002, 14:28:49
Hey Maroule! You are based in Paris yet are (depressingly) familiar with Wimbledon FC.

You a displaced Brit or what?

(OECD?)

King_Ghidra
23-10-2002, 14:30:06
RC!! stop trying to make friends with the outworlder!

Venom
23-10-2002, 14:31:01
Is sulking related to skulking?

maroule
23-10-2002, 14:33:34
Originally posted by Resource Consumer
Hey Maroule! You are based in Paris yet are (depressingly) familiar with Wimbledon FC.

You a displaced Brit or what?

(OECD?)


nope, I'm as French as you get, which by the way means I know english football like no other, since we run the place...

But I was working in sunny England when Eric C the seagull hero arrived, and have been afflicted with a passion for CM since the 92 edition. So I qualify as the best WFC/Vinny Jones afficinado in Paris...:vom:

Resource Consumer
23-10-2002, 14:41:08
OK. I am a displaced PSG fan:o. As a result of 5+ years in Paris during the glory (?) years of Weah and Ginola.

CM4 due out soon apparently.

Venom
23-10-2002, 14:44:42
French...that explains so much.

maroule
23-10-2002, 14:47:09
Originally posted by Resource Consumer
OK. I am a displaced PSG fan:o. As a result of 5+ years in Paris during the glory (?) years of Weah and Ginola.

CM4 due out soon apparently.

being a PSG fan right has been an exercise is mental pain control/masochism for the last couple of years, and I know what I'm saying, I still ache. These were glory days, with Ricardo, Valdo, the matches against Real Madrid, etc.

As for CM4, I'm a sucker and will probably buy it. Again. As all the fucking versions they ever sold. And I don't even get a kiss while I'm being sodomised.

Resource Consumer
23-10-2002, 15:02:32
Originally posted by maroule
being a PSG fan right has been an exercise is mental pain control/masochism for the last couple of years, and I know what I'm saying, I still ache. These were glory days, with Ricardo, Valdo, the matches against Real Madrid, etc.

As for CM4, I'm a sucker and will probably buy it. Again. As all the fucking versions they ever sold. And I don't even get a kiss while I'm being sodomised.

Ah, those names. Le Guen, Djorkaev, Mboma, Nuoma. The victory against Arsenal :) (some things don't change in France).

Yep. Me too - I worte an article about the systematic rip-off that is the CM-series. But, I too still bought.

I look forward to the eye candy in CM4 though.

Resource Consumer
23-10-2002, 15:03:25
And I remember Joel Bats last game. Where he lost the ball in the centre circle (yes, really) and conceded the goal. Great stuff.

Why is it PSG can only play for 85 minutes a game?

maroule
23-10-2002, 15:03:55
Originally posted by Venom
French...that explains so much.
yep
superior intellect, dashingly handsome and better dressed
more time on my hands, too

Funkodrom
23-10-2002, 15:05:32
Originally posted by maroule
nope, I'm as French as you get, which by the way means I know english football like no other, since we run the place...

True! Did you watch France vs France under 21s in the Champions league last night?

King_Ghidra
23-10-2002, 15:06:43
Originally posted by maroule
being a PSG fan right has been an exercise is mental pain control/masochism for the last couple of years,

i remember the 'PSG est le Benny Hill de foot' incident :lol:

maroule
23-10-2002, 15:07:05
Originally posted by Resource Consumer
Why is it PSG can only play for 85 minutes a game?

they're lucky when they play 15mn. Fernandez is a great coach/motivator for small teams, but a crap one for big ones. He changed his tactics 3452 times this season and wonders why his players are lost.

Anyway, club football is very dead in France for structural reasons : too small a fan base + fiscal weights = exodus of the best players. To England, mostly.

Resource Consumer
23-10-2002, 15:07:29
Victory to France U-21s, I thought. Given the senior sides performance in the World Cup, I suppose not entirely unexpected.;)

Venom
23-10-2002, 15:07:40
Come one 100.

maroule
23-10-2002, 15:09:00
Originally posted by Funkodrom
True! Did you watch France vs France under 21s in the Champions league last night?

no, I didn't, unfortunately.
I would have had a bad case of schyzophrenia, though, not knowing who to support...

Anyway, apparently my favorite defender did well : P. Mexes. I always buy him in CM... I was happy to see Pires return, too.

Funkodrom
23-10-2002, 15:09:32
Originally posted by Resource Consumer
Victory to France U-21s, I thought. Given the senior sides performance in the World Cup, I suppose not entirely unexpected.;)

Auxerre looked really impressive. Better going forward than they looked at home.

Resource Consumer
23-10-2002, 15:13:51
Mexes looked real quality. Is he relatively cheap in CM? I usually clean up on the ridiculously priced Scandinavians. (I usually start in English conference so maybe Mexes is out of my reach for a couple of years or so)

maroule
23-10-2002, 15:24:02
Originally posted by Resource Consumer
Mexes looked real quality. Is he relatively cheap in CM? I usually clean up on the ridiculously priced Scandinavians. (I usually start in English conference so maybe Mexes is out of my reach for a couple of years or so)


he is very cheap but play libero, you have to retrain him to DC
he can be temperamental though, if he doesn't play he'll break your balls

Sean
23-10-2002, 15:27:09
In 01/02, you can usually get Mexes and Cisse for £10m total on minimum fee release clauses.

Oh, and Wimbledon FC or Wimbledon AFC?

DaShi
23-10-2002, 15:34:35
Sigh. This thread took a turn for the worst. :(

Sean
23-10-2002, 15:39:00
Originally posted by maroule
he is very cheap but play libero, you have to retrain him to DC
he can be temperamental though, if he doesn't play he'll break your balls
Strange, I find that sometimes players play better slightly out of their listed position. Mexes has worked well as a DC for me before without retraining, and Doni (Atalanta) has done well as a wing back.

maroule
23-10-2002, 15:42:08
Originally posted by Sean
Strange, I find that sometimes players play better slightly out of their listed position. Mexes has worked well as a DC for me before without retraining, and Doni (Atalanta) has done well as a wing back.

Interesting, have to try. I tend to retrain them because although they can produce first class performances at the wrong position, I feel they are more erratic/less regular . But you never know which cause has which effect in this F***ing game anyway, so...

Sean
23-10-2002, 15:43:05
Yeah, it’s some kind of crazy voodoo.

DaShi
23-10-2002, 15:43:18
X-Fear :shoot:

Venom
23-10-2002, 15:44:01
Potty mouth!

Sean
23-10-2002, 15:46:53
Originally posted by DaShi
X-Fear :shoot:
X-Post :bounce:.

King_Ghidra
23-10-2002, 15:53:10
:lol: watch dashi for an x-fear of his own soon after that nasty incident

Funkodrom
23-10-2002, 15:56:39
Back to the original subject. Someone at TotalWar was saying that if Venom gets paid it's for trying to increase hits to this site.

If he's getting paid for reviews why aren't I?! :D

Resource Consumer
23-10-2002, 16:10:01
Why don't I get paid for my posts? And whoever worried about being on subject here.:)

Venom
23-10-2002, 16:37:38
I'm supposed to get paid for this?

Sean
23-10-2002, 16:45:47
As in, ‘you’ll pay for this, you bastard!’?

LoD
23-10-2002, 17:09:11
Damn. We've got invaded, and I missed the show :)...

Venom
23-10-2002, 17:35:43
NAVARRO! Where's my fucking money!

EuroLord
23-10-2002, 17:59:31
Hi all,

I found your so-called review of Medieval Total War to be totally untrue and unrealistic. Have you actually played it?

The game is without doubt one of the best of the year, the only problem is, you may need a bit of intelligence to play it.

It is after all a thinking persons game, which is better than can be said of your review. I might have a little rmore respect for your review if you had been capable of writing without using pointless bad language in every sentence.

If you are going to do a review, do one!! You are entitled to your opinion, but dont show yourself up with your very poor knowledge of the language.

Total War is great fun. Ignore this so-called review and give it a try.

EuroLord

Sean
23-10-2002, 18:01:17
I might have a little more respect for your post if you read the thread first.

Venom
23-10-2002, 18:04:22
There is no bad language. Only language that uptight prudes prefer not be used.

And again, all you can say is it was a good. Not one of you has tried to refute my review. You just flame me like bitches and then whine that the game was good. Only maroule has even come close to forming an argument but he's overexagerating everything to try and come off like some genius.

If you actually read the review you'd see that I did enjoy pieces of it. Just not enough of it.

And try harder than to insult my intelligence. If you can't see the satire and the self-deprecation in that review for what it is, then you're the idiot. Not me.

The Shaker
23-10-2002, 18:07:04
Originally posted by Funkodrom
I never tried Shogun: Total War 'cause of all the problems people had getting it to run. The Shaker has basically the same make and model of PC as me and he had a nightmare with it. Problems with Athlons with GeForce2s or something I think.

I should probably point out that once I found out what the problem was I never had any more problems with it and played it solidly for quite a while, although bemoaning the fact that the Risk-like section of the game could have been vasty more involved. I even bought the expansion.
I remember DS hated it, but i think beta and/or Funky loved it too.



Would I want to buy MTW on top of that?
(And cossacks and AoK ;) )
Is it significantly different, or just another new units/races wotsit?
Can I be arsed reading Venoms review? Probably

And given all the problems I had with STW I definately want to know whether of not it's going to be crashing all the time.


Maroule...If you want a CM challenge, try taking control of Bury :)

Scabrous Birdseed
23-10-2002, 18:37:37
I've tried it once. I did absolutely fucking awful.

Sir Penguin
23-10-2002, 21:13:50
i hate u vemon u r fag u hav a smal dick

Sir Penguin
23-10-2002, 21:16:44
Originally posted by maroule

<snip>
IF you get a kick with the idea of attacking janissaries with kataphractoi (biz heavy cavalry) and Nafta throwers.
<snip>

They put Brian Mulroney in the game? :eek:

If the game's that buggy, Darkstar should have reviewed it. Then everybody would be satisfied.

SP

Goob
23-10-2002, 21:48:55
Lol Venom, and LOL at the .org posters coming over to gripe.

I'm half thinking of putting on my .org persona and going over there and trying to educate them about Venom, but nah they wouldn't get it.

I've played M:TW for almost 2 months now, I've slowed down recently waiting for the patch before I get involved in another campaign. I am obviously enjoying myself more than Venom does getting blowjobs on the beach. At the same time I found myself agreeing with much of what Venom critiqued about the game.

The Graphics and sound range from good to ho hum, but definitely nothing to get excited about.

The TBS gameplay, I'd agree with Venom, I've found little here to excite me other than my high degree of interest in the time period and allowing that to rub off to the point of generating some "hey this is cool moments" But I constantly have to prompt myself not to take advantage of bugs in the system. And I have yet to find much in the way of Strategy, other than discovering what sets off various AI flags and when I do want to do that and when I don't.

The part that I enjoy the most is the RTS battles. I have not enjoyed any other RTS games battles as much as this one's. Does that mean that this game has created a unique - non derivative battle system that in some qualitative way blows away all the other games??? No I can't say that, I just know that I enjoy it more. In part because the battles feel like battles. Unfortunately battles against the AI feel like battles against a 10 year old commander with little to no imagination. Equally unfortunately for me is that as a result of my long years of TBS playing and my contemplative nature, I am as slow as molasses in RTS battles and I would get my ass reamed by quick thinking/quick reacting RTS gurus and so I don't really get into the online gaming. (Which may be a hidden blessing with all that I have read about the problems people are having with the MP system online.)

I will also say that with a couple hundred hours of game play I have yet to suffer from an unplayable save file or a crash to desktop. (Knock on Venom's head)

I am sure that sometime before November is out my attention will have wondered to another game, possibly AoM, possibly Tropico, or maybe somthing else I haven't looked at yet.

You can now return to the football related thread-jacking. :)

Venom
23-10-2002, 22:29:49
SP you you anal ranging cum dumpster!

And stop agreeing with me goob. It's scary.

Sir Penguin
23-10-2002, 22:51:43
I'm at a loss for comebacks.

SP

Resource Consumer
23-10-2002, 23:52:15
Eurolord,

Venom's use of the language is indeed colourful and, to a lot of tastes, entertaining. A completely ambivalent review is, frankly, a waste of time. An honest opinion is not. Your superior language skills to mine are noted. However, do not fall into the trap of demeaning someone's point as they do not speak the same code as you. That is part of the story as to how the British aristocracy became so inbred.

I have not tried MTW, largely due to my grisly experiences with STW, which I found colourful (if you like black and red on an RTS basis) but rather far from entertaining (on a very 1970s half-wit board game basis). Sadly the model seems to have been maintained.

Additionally, I think the goobmeister puts it all rather nicely.

Maroule,

You should maybe consider joining our UK premiership league here and supporting your extremely large French contingent in stuffing us "know it all English"?:)

Darkstar
24-10-2002, 02:05:56
STW... I started of really liking that game... like most games I try. High hopes for fun, enjoying the discovery of the game, etc...

STW fell down pretty quick for me. It had very pretty weather in the RTS battle. The actual battle though... it was cheesy. The AI tried to play 'run corner to corner until time is out', but always did so with slow land units. But it taught all players to do so. The battle area was also too small... in a decent battle, you'd smash the opponent back to his rear edge, and then had the rest of the battle won, because his reinforcements straggled in... routed... and ran away. That was purely an artificiality of the 'RTS' arena. Add in the AI being a massive idiot, something my 6 year old cousins could beat, and the RTS blew. Other then the pretty weather. ;)

I didn't mind the board game of STW... except for the fact that it was too much a board game at times. Particularly when you had a bunch of different units and armies, going about in various tasks, on the small board areas, that just sucked. Created situations of excess work, having to click madly trying to grab the particular group you wanted to move, or trying to set down the newest group. There was no excuse for that... it's a computer game, utilize the medium!

I'll eventually give a MTW a spin... but I haven't heard anyone say anything that makes me think it's a real advance over STW. I've heard plenty from those more knowledgable then Venom in why it will most likely blow more then STW... like total linear, total boring game play... could be massively buggy (and I've got extraordinary luck in having bugs come alive), etc. There is always the chance that I'll love MTW, but so far... it doesn't sound like it's a good chance.

Venom
24-10-2002, 02:10:21
But I was right, wasn't I? I know it's painful to say, but you can say it!

Darkstar
24-10-2002, 02:12:57
Who are you talking to? So far, most of the passing spammage has agreed with you, Venom. When they said anything about the game at all. ;)

Venom
24-10-2002, 02:20:56
I'm gloating in general. It feels good.

Venom
24-10-2002, 02:27:02
And looking back on it, I didn't even cuss that much in that review. Unless your a prude and consider whore and blow job to be curse words. I did reference Sid Meier for which I apologize.

Darkstar
24-10-2002, 05:27:06
You should apologize for that!

Shining1
24-10-2002, 06:17:39
That was probably what Eurolord was complaining about.

But it's seriously funny to see people coming here and flaming Venom like he's some 16 year old FPS fan who played the game for 2 minutes and then broke the CD in a fit of pique.

Kinda shows just who's intelligence is really in question:).




Sigh. This thread took a turn for the worst.

Yes, the dreaded Europeon Foutboll is spreading to the other forums as well. I estimate that in 9 months the site will be called Counterball and the front page will consist entirely of links to the FIFA homepage.

Forums:
Counterpoint
(Talk about football, football, football, football, football, or even football).

International Competitions
(Talk about football being played outside of Europe)

Other Games
(Talk about football or games that aren't football)

Music
(What do you like to listen to when watching football?)

Film, Fiction and Writing about football
(Bend it like Beckham, Feverpitch, or discuss the latest Vinnie Jones movie)

Darkstar
24-10-2002, 06:23:38
:lol:@Shining!

Hey! What about that fantastic talk! Decoding whatisitcalled... don't go empty on us, Shining1.

maroule
24-10-2002, 07:32:31
Originally posted by Resource Consumer

Maroule,

You should maybe consider joining our UK premiership league here and supporting your extremely large French contingent in stuffing us "know it all English"?:)


I'm back (at work)
One of my nicest memory as a student was the apocalyptic shock the King (the real one, not Elvis) caused when he arrived in Manchester. Up until then, you English pigs had only contempt for us French sportsmen. With some justification as the only player who had done the trip previously was Didier Six, playing 16 matches for Aston Villa. Congratulations for those who remember, you’re officially wasting memory storage capacity for a totally useless fact. Eric blew that perception off, and quite interestingly became the embodiment for everything French : talented but half mad, full of bogus philosophical one liners but hardly able to speak English after 5 years there, individualistic but able to transcend the whole team, etc. Loads of clichés, but true in his case, which made it so amusing. Gascoigne also became the embodiment for everything English in Italy during his stay with Lazio : drunkard, wife beater, fat slob, always injured, etc.

Venom, as for trying to come across as a genius, I am either 1/ an authentic one 2/ coming across as articulate only in comparison to you. Notice how sparsely I use references to the action of sucking/licking penises, or to women of low morality.

For MTW, I’ve been playing it a month and a half solid, and will do it at a reduced rate for another few weeks probably. The game is linear as for the cycle conquest/build up, trade/conquest, but each faction have significant differences so it offers genuine replay value. Good point on the AI acting like a 10 years old, you actually have to come up with home made harman rules to spice up things.

Funkodrom
24-10-2002, 08:32:21
Originally posted by Darkstar
:lol:@Shining!

Hey! What about that fantastic talk! Decoding whatisitcalled... don't go empty on us, Shining1.

Ronglish. http://www.dangerhere.com to learn more.

King_Ghidra
24-10-2002, 08:36:43
Originally posted by maroule


Anyway, apparently my favorite defender did well : P. Mexes. I always buy him in CM...

in this month's 'world soccer' magazine they call him 'one of the most coveted young players in europe, if not the world'

Resource Consumer
24-10-2002, 08:47:46
Originally posted by maroule
I'm back (at work)
One of my nicest memory as a student was the apocalyptic shock the King (the real one, not Elvis) caused when he arrived in Manchester. Up until then, you English pigs had only contempt for us French sportsmen. With some justification as the only player who had done the trip previously was Didier Six, playing 16 matches for Aston Villa. Congratulations for those who remember, you’re officially wasting memory storage capacity for a totally useless fact. Eric blew that perception off, and quite interestingly became the embodiment for everything French : talented but half mad, full of bogus philosophical one liners but hardly able to speak English after 5 years there, individualistic but able to transcend the whole team, etc. Loads of clichés, but true in his case, which made it so amusing. Gascoigne also became the embodiment for everything English in Italy during his stay with Lazio : drunkard, wife beater, fat slob, always injured, etc.

Venom, as for trying to come across as a genius, I am either 1/ an authentic one 2/ coming across as articulate only in comparison to you. Notice how sparsely I use references to the action of sucking/licking penises, or to women of low morality.

For MTW, I’ve been playing it a month and a half solid, and will do it at a reduced rate for another few weeks probably. The game is linear as for the cycle conquest/build up, trade/conquest, but each faction have significant differences so it offers genuine replay value. Good point on the AI acting like a 10 years old, you actually have to come up with home made harman rules to spice up things.

My favourite memory of Cantona was his last game in France. The incident where he threw the ball at the referee and started marching off the pitch. The ref had to run after him to administer the red card

"c'est trop restictif" as the Cantona puppet used to say on les Guignols.

maroule
24-10-2002, 08:48:30
Originally posted by King_Ghidra
in this month's 'world soccer' magazine they call him 'one of the most coveted young players in europe, if not the world'

I'm not surprised. France football did a paper on him 4 years ago, when he was 16, saying he would be the next Laurent Blanc. Actually France Football (a bi weekly) is quite incredible, they had done the same with young Robert Pires, 10 years ago, predicting a bright future to this youngter from Metz...

maroule
24-10-2002, 08:51:59
Originally posted by Resource Consumer
My favourite memory of Cantona was his last game in France. The incident where he threw the ball at the referee and started marching off the pitch. The ref had to run after him to administer the red card

"c'est trop restictif" as the Cantona puppet used to say on les Guignols.

'puisque c'est ça, je me casse'...
:lol: but it doesn't beat calling the national coach a 'bag of shit'...

Resource Consumer
24-10-2002, 08:56:07
Which French national coach in particular was he talking about?;)

maroule
24-10-2002, 09:00:22
Originally posted by Resource Consumer
Which French national coach in particular was he talking about?;)

Henry Michel, who had the nerves of not selecting him once...
But he paid dearly, and when Zidane started emerging, they looked for the first excuse to evict him, and got it with the kung fu kick. He never played in the French team after that... Good for France, probably, but bad for the show...

Funkodrom
24-10-2002, 09:32:17
He was a great character.

Resource Consumer
24-10-2002, 10:31:35
He still is a great character

maroule
24-10-2002, 10:34:00
apparently he will be also be a fat character (in his next movie)

Resource Consumer
24-10-2002, 10:38:27
He should have trained harder:)

BTW, Maroule, www.premierleague.com is running a fantasy league - you can join our private league if you like (you'd be a bit late but we can assume a minimum number of points already - besides you'd probably overtake half the losers there anyway).

If interested, I (or someone else) will dig out the joining code.

See, for example, http://www.counterglow.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=8210

[edit]

league name : counterglow
code : paulvdb@opl_62284

maroule
24-10-2002, 12:03:50
Originally posted by Resource Consumer
He should have trained harder:)

BTW, Maroule, www.premierleague.com is running a fantasy league - you can join our private league if you like (you'd be a bit late but we can assume a minimum number of points already - besides you'd probably overtake half the losers there anyway).

If interested, I (or someone else) will dig out the joining code.

See, for example, http://www.counterglow.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=8210

[edit]

league name : counterglow
code : paulvdb@opl_62284

done
so how much points do I get to make up for my late start?

King_Ghidra
24-10-2002, 12:06:21
none :D

Venom
24-10-2002, 12:18:01
Originally posted by maroule
I'm back (at work)
Notice how sparsely I use references to the action of sucking/licking penises, or to women of low morality.


That makes you smart how? All that makes you is a typical egotistical Frenchman.

maroule
24-10-2002, 12:26:14
c'mon, at least give me 138 (your wort player has 139)

pleaaaase
and Venom, stop flatering me, I don't like brown nosers

Sean
24-10-2002, 12:27:20
Look, just copy my team, you’ll be mid-table in no time.

maroule
24-10-2002, 12:29:48
hum, we have 3 players in common
very balanced formation, the 2-5-3, would love to play you in CM

Sean
24-10-2002, 12:31:47
In CM I keep it simple. 4-4-2, 4-5-1, or 5-3-2. I did once go with a 5-1-4, though.

maroule
24-10-2002, 12:33:59
Originally posted by Sean
In CM I keep it simple. 4-4-2, 4-5-1, or 5-3-2. I did once go with a 5-1-4, though.

my best results were achieved with a 4-4-1-1 outside,
and a 4-2-3-1 at home, passing, normal game, zonal defending, hard tackle.

How do you change your formation in the premiership game?

Sean
24-10-2002, 12:37:12
Originally posted by maroule
my best results were achieved with a 4-4-1-1 outside,
and a 4-2-3-1 at home, passing, normal game, zonal defending, hard tackle.
Passing? I never play passing because I always have tall, strong forwards.

You change your formation by selecting eleven players with the checkboxes under their names.

Resource Consumer
24-10-2002, 12:37:47
I think it is fair that we add you in at 139. We can't actually edit that into the table on the premierleague.com site but we can edit it into the table that we put in the competitions forum.

Sean
24-10-2002, 12:38:23
Good idea.

maroule
24-10-2002, 12:41:19
done,
live in fear now
passing is good even for tall players
when I play 4231, the 3 in support attack normally center the ball and you get plenty of headed goals anyhow. I use Saha as my single frontman, and at least 40% of his goals are headers, even with a passing style (but I ask my 2 wingers to center, of course)

Resource Consumer
24-10-2002, 12:41:54
Added in - subject to agreement of others

http://www.counterglow.net/forum/showthread.php?s=&threadid=8210

maroule
24-10-2002, 12:42:24
Originally posted by Resource Consumer
I think it is fair that we add you in at 139. We can't actually edit that into the table on the premierleague.com site but we can edit it into the table that we put in the competitions forum.


thanks a bunch
I'll wait for the general approval then...

Resource Consumer
24-10-2002, 13:12:48
I assume agreement is given unless somebody starts shouting at us (which I think is highly unlikely).

Venom
24-10-2002, 13:24:38
I DISAGREE!!!!!!!!!

maroule
24-10-2002, 13:30:15
Originally posted by Venom
I DISAGREE!!!!!!!!!
c'mon Venom, your last blow job was a disaster, so you wouldn't want me to suck you up, now, would you...

but if your pundit skills are as good as your reviewer's skills, I understand you're afraid of the challenge...

Funkodrom
24-10-2002, 13:31:51
:lol: He's not even playing that game. :D

Venom
24-10-2002, 13:43:15
My god you're an idiot maroule. :lol:

Venom
24-10-2002, 13:43:46
And it wasn't my last blow job. My last blow job was on the plane back from New Zealand. And it was quite successful.

maroule
24-10-2002, 13:46:15
Originally posted by Venom
And it wasn't my last blow job. My last blow job was on the plane back from New Zealand. And it was quite successful.

Venom, you come across as being very insecure. You want to talk about it?

Venom
24-10-2002, 13:47:58
I come across exaclty how I want you to think of me. Remember that.

maroule
24-10-2002, 14:08:46
if it's 'insecure about my sexuality', and 'afraid to be called a faggot', you're doing fine.

I'm already starting to like the little boy in you.

Nav
24-10-2002, 14:30:17
hey its unfair, it took a lot of effort for me to get 139. :(

maroule
24-10-2002, 14:38:28
Originally posted by Nav
hey its unfair, it took a lot of effort for me to get 139. :(

I don't mind starting a bit lower.

King_Ghidra
24-10-2002, 14:53:08
x-fear!!!! :shoot:

easy! i rule the x-fear leaderboard

Venom
24-10-2002, 14:53:18
You couldn't form a coherent argument or insult to save your life. You're quoting source material that doesn't exist. Perhaps you should try reading other threads to see how afraid I am of these accusations.

You're my bitch and you don't even know it.

maroule
24-10-2002, 14:57:33
Originally posted by Venom

You're my bitch and you don't even know it.

Proving my point, repressed gay...
But it's ok, it's not for me to judge, really.

Venom
24-10-2002, 17:49:39
Again, do a search for some information before you accuse me of that. Check how many times I've been called gay and called myself.

You just look ridiculous trying to argue or insult me. You're incredibly off the mark. If this is the intelligence one needs to play Total War and enjoy it, I should really get stupider and have some fun with that game.

Apparently you have a thing for the gay comments though as everything you say comes back to that.

Goob
24-10-2002, 17:54:50
maroule, like everyone else, if you stay here long enough you'll end up loving Venom.

unless you are like that small 29% of people who think he is disgusting.

or that infitesimal 27% who try hard to ignore him kinda like you when you are disgusted that stores put up their christmas displays in October, but you try to pretend they're not there to maintain your sanity.

or that microscopic 24.5% who are still wondering which institution he wandered away from in the middle of the night and are trying to figure out how to lure him back.

Oh and we are all repressed homosexuals around here, except for the euros who aren't repressed.

Sir Penguin
24-10-2002, 22:11:12
What about the 19.5% whom he failed to kill?

SP

Sir Penguin
24-10-2002, 22:11:54
Though come to think on it (maybe I should think before posting...) technically he's failed to kill 100% of people.

SP

LoD
24-10-2002, 22:27:34
Originally posted by Venom
Again, do a search for some information before you accuse me of that. Check how many times I've been called gay and called myself.


Can't... resist....
gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay gay.
Shit I feel so weak.

Sir Penguin
24-10-2002, 22:39:23
Happy now?

SP

LoD
24-10-2002, 22:50:51
Quite the opposite, as I've said.

Venom
24-10-2002, 23:34:50
Good god! I'm gay?

Nav
25-10-2002, 00:03:12
What else did you and Funkodrom do for a week when you shared rooms in NZ?

Venom
25-10-2002, 00:21:54
Drew pretty pictures of flowers...but that doesn't make us gay right?

Sir Penguin
25-10-2002, 01:46:59
Where did you draw the flowers?

SP

Venom
25-10-2002, 02:43:43
On some nice floral print paper.

Darkstar
25-10-2002, 02:44:22
Where do you think they drew the pictures?

Sir Penguin
25-10-2002, 03:29:42
Paper.

That's not gay at all!

SP

Darkstar
25-10-2002, 03:51:46
It is when the are using the other one's butt for an easel.

Goob
25-10-2002, 05:37:33
If I Were Gay by Stephen Lynch

Here we are, dear old friend
You and i, drunk again.
Laughs have been had, and tears have been shed
Maybe the whiskey's gone to my head, but...

If I were gay, i would give you my heart
And if I were gay, you'd be my work of art.
If I were gay, we would swim in romance....

But I'm not gay
So get your hand out of my pants.
It's not that I don't care (I do)...

I just don't see myself in you.

Another time, another scene
I'd be right behind you
if you know what i mean.

'Cause if I were gay, I would give you my soul
If I were gay, I would give you my whole...being(get it?)
If I were gay, we would tear down the walls.
But I'm not gay
So won't you stop cupping my...hand

We've never hugged, we've never kissed
I've never been intimate with your fist
You have opened brand new doors
So get over here and drop your drawers.

I heard this on the radio this evening, and among other things I thought of Venom.

maroule
25-10-2002, 07:30:53
great thread, love it
thanks to all for the free therapy for Venom, he deserved the helping hand (in his trousers)

Funkodrom
25-10-2002, 08:31:53
Originally posted by Nav
What else did you and Funkodrom do for a week when you shared rooms in NZ?

It was mainly hard fucking.

LoD
25-10-2002, 09:27:16
I see... you're both die-hard fitness enthusiasts.

Funkodrom
25-10-2002, 09:41:21
Yeah, we keep fit by fighting terrorists in tower blocks.

LoD
25-10-2002, 09:47:27
:gasmaske:

Venom
25-10-2002, 11:56:32
You weren't hard at all Funko.

Funkodrom
25-10-2002, 12:00:42
you fell asleep.

Venom
25-10-2002, 12:06:04
You were boring and small.

Funkodrom
25-10-2002, 12:45:41
<BLOCK>

Can't argue with that. :cry:

Shining1
25-10-2002, 13:15:29
You can argue with anything.

Funkodrom
25-10-2002, 13:35:00
No I can't!

Venom
25-10-2002, 14:12:30
YES YOU CAN!

Funkodrom
25-10-2002, 14:31:51
NO! I! CAN'T!

Sean
25-10-2002, 14:33:00
Originally posted by Funkodrom
No I can't!
That should be a 100-0.

Venom
25-10-2002, 14:42:55
YES YOU CAN!

Funkodrom
25-10-2002, 14:45:31
This is contradiction not arguing.

Venom
25-10-2002, 15:10:24
I'll just be on my way then.

Funkodrom
25-10-2002, 15:12:01
No you won't.

Venom
25-10-2002, 15:42:27
YES I WILL!

Funkodrom
25-10-2002, 15:44:11
No. You won't.

Venom
25-10-2002, 15:49:36
YES I WILL!

I forgot how the skit ends.

Funkodrom
25-10-2002, 15:55:24
No you didn't.

Venom
25-10-2002, 15:59:19
YES I DID!

Funkodrom
25-10-2002, 16:10:04
No you didn't!

Venom
25-10-2002, 17:14:08
YES I DID!

Funkodrom
25-10-2002, 23:16:57
No, and I mean this quite seriously, you didn't.

Venom
25-10-2002, 23:42:55
Are you serious?

Funkodrom
25-10-2002, 23:47:48
Maybe.

Venom
25-10-2002, 23:52:07
I think you are.

Sir Penguin
26-10-2002, 01:06:24
I'm confused. Isn't there supposed to be people yelling here?

SP

Funkodrom
26-10-2002, 08:53:20
No there isn't.

Sir Penguin
26-10-2002, 09:07:23
Oh. All right then.

SP

Beta1
26-10-2002, 20:06:13
Couldnt be arsed to read all the previous posts.

Anyway I rather like MTW. Unlike venom I think the simplicity of the TBS bit is one of the games plusses.Yes its primarily a way of building units for the rts bit but then thats kind of the main point.

Anyway I would give it a b- rather than a d- and then I think I'm being harsh. save the d's e's and f's for crap like gangsters.

And I've only had it crash twice since I played it and it turns out thats cos I've got too much in my case and the dam thing is overheating.

But its not the best strategy game out there. Thats combat mission and as yet I've played nothing to beat it.

Venom
27-10-2002, 04:52:34
Didn't I give it a D+?

Thrax
27-10-2002, 21:35:23
From MTW to gays to football to flower painting...

Whats next?

Did you see Abandon? Some good shots of Katie Holmes half-naked but thats about it. Dont waste your money on it.

Sir Penguin
28-10-2002, 01:13:07
You get used to it.

SP

Shining1
28-10-2002, 07:27:09
Possibly the threadjacks were inspired by the Total: Lack of Defense given to MTW.

Also, get any two Europeons from anywhere who don't actually know each other and you can get a 4 hour/20 beer debate going about the merits of everyone's UEFA stuff.

And we all came to this site to escape from An. She's occasionally seen stalking JimmyTrick on Apolyton, though.

Funkodrom
28-10-2002, 10:33:04
"Also, get any two Europeons from anywhere who don't actually know each other and you can get a 4 hour/ 20 beer debate going about the merits of everyone's UEFA stuff."

Even if they barely share a common language other than football sometimes.

Scabrous Birdseed
28-10-2002, 11:23:50
X-fear :shoot:

Funkodrom
28-10-2002, 11:42:55
I was just quoting part of his post, the other stuff wasn't relevant.

Shining1
28-10-2002, 12:48:41
What is X-fear in that context, please?

Funkodrom
28-10-2002, 12:53:25
Quoting the last post in a thread because you fear a X-post. You can spot one when someone's used the quote button but there are no posts between theirs and the one they quoted.

Venom
28-10-2002, 12:58:08
Saw Jackass over the weekend. Extremely lowbrow...but extremely hilarious.

Goob
28-10-2002, 16:01:31
Venom, I am glad that you are loosening up a bit and starting to enjoy the more "low brow" type of humor.

Its good to broaden your horizons, even it means that you are just seeing more of the gutter.

Venom
28-10-2002, 16:04:32
If you can't laugh when someone almost dies flipping over a golf cart, you're just not human.

LoD
28-10-2002, 18:21:00
Mispost :nervous:.

Qweeg
30-10-2002, 13:31:21
Venoms always been a little flacky:)

Good review though, I shall now not buy this game.

Lurker
05-11-2002, 22:12:45
Mr. Venom:

I am new here and I found your review to be a very bad review. You obviously do not know how to play a computer game. You probably spend all of your time getting beat up at school. You lie when you say you had a girlfriend. No girl would ever talk to you, much less be nice too you. You are a stupid boy. I am surprised if you even know what a blowjob is, unless you give them to your friend Funkodrom all the time.

MTW is the best computer game every made by anyone and it will probably be the best game for the next 20 years. Maybe more. It is better than Civ III even. And I bet you don't even know who made Civ III!!!! You are not qualified to write reviews. This site sucks for even letting you write a review, and everyone who posts here probably sucks too. You are so stupid, are you Dutch or something?

Go cry to your mommy about what I said. I don't care. You are a loser.

OldWarrior_42
06-11-2002, 05:48:09
This is one of the best threads I have seen in a long time... in comparison to Bossmans penis enlargement thread. :lol:

Except for that soccer stuff. :rolleyes: Football? No... it's soccer.

Darkstar
06-11-2002, 08:35:30
:lol:@Lurker!

And that's the longest post of yours I can recall you posting Lurker. Where did that inspiration come from?

Shining1
06-11-2002, 08:52:18
Lurkers are fearsome when they fight, that's for sure:).

Venom
06-11-2002, 16:29:58
He called me Dutch....That's just wrong!

Immortal Wombat
20-12-2002, 11:26:21
I agree

Beta1
20-12-2002, 13:17:33
Me too. He should have called him Belgian

TAZ
11-02-2003, 18:45:29
^burp^

maroule
12-02-2003, 08:52:43
Originally posted by Darkstar
Maroule, why would any *fan* of the game be flaming a moron that obviously doesn't get *it*? When he (or she) could be playing the game? The only answer that really makes sense to that is that you are at work/school, and since you cannot play the game, you are talking about it. Are you at work? At school? If not... why worry about it?

You are not participating in the MTW community. You are flaming someone of another community. That's just harassment. And here, it's pointless. Unless you plan on joining the community? That's the only way we will take you serious. .

that was some time ago *sniff*, how ironic that I indeed joined

but how course I doubt anybody takes me seriously even so
:bounce:

Funkodrom
12-02-2003, 10:22:57
The whole review was a secret plot to get Total War fans to join the board. ;)

maroule
12-02-2003, 10:53:12
I'm the only one to get stuck here apparently :D
but Venom can do a paper on the extension (viking invasion)

Hey, I can do an Age of mythology review with plenty of gay/sodomie references, that would bring attention...