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King_Ghidra
06-10-2008, 12:17:53
Wie kastriert man einen Kuhlschrank?

Tuer auf, Eier raus, Tuer zu!

Funko
06-10-2008, 12:28:29
:lol:

Drekkus
06-10-2008, 12:43:35
Mein Gott :nervous:

Nills Lagerbaak
06-10-2008, 12:52:10
Sehr kommisch.

Vincent
06-10-2008, 12:54:43
Kuhl

Tizzy
06-10-2008, 13:00:56
I don't get it

Drekkus
06-10-2008, 13:05:55
That joke was so kuhl it schrank my eggs.

Dyl Ulenspiegel
06-10-2008, 13:21:19
:lol:

MoSe
06-10-2008, 14:00:55
lol, Ei for an Ei!

:bash:

King_Ghidra
06-10-2008, 15:47:31
btw i should explain i don't understand any of this, and google translate just told me something about castrated fridges and eggs that made no sense

any attempts at explanation appreciated

Bob
06-10-2008, 15:53:22
It's german zen.

MoSe
06-10-2008, 16:10:43
Ten eggs?

MoSe
06-10-2008, 16:11:56
it works with spanish huevos too

MoSe
06-10-2008, 16:12:46
in english you should keep nuts in the fridge, tho.

LoD
06-10-2008, 16:22:39
Originally posted by MoSe
it works with spanish huevos too

And in Polish as well - truly, a magnificent joke!

Lurker the Second
06-10-2008, 16:38:03
What, this thread's not about Vinnie?

Dyl Ulenspiegel
06-10-2008, 20:45:31
It's about Vinnie the Cool Shrank.

LoD
06-10-2008, 23:17:48
:lol:

Greg W
07-10-2008, 00:37:16
Originally posted by King_Ghidra
btw i should explain i don't understand any of this, and google translate just told me something about castrated fridges and eggs that made no sense

any attempts at explanation appreciated ditto. Bablefish translation didn't help neither.

MoSe
07-10-2008, 06:58:05
I was looking for an explanation to link, and I found:

"A testis, especially one contained within a scrotum"
... "especially" ?????? If you take it out of its nest, does it lose its nature???????

The commonest slang terms for them in other languages are words that mean "balls," "stones," "nuts," "eggs".

C.G.B. Spender
07-10-2008, 07:54:34
You know the sound of two eggs in the fridge. What is the sound when the door is closed?

Funko
07-10-2008, 08:00:10
I assume eggs is slang for testicles or it doesn't make sense. So the joke goes:

How do you castrate a fridge?

Open door, eggs out, close door.

C.G.B. Spender
07-10-2008, 08:15:32
So you think that makes sense?

Funko
07-10-2008, 08:20:20
Yes.

C.G.B. Spender
07-10-2008, 08:26:18
But a fridge is a device and eggs do not belong to that device.
If there's a any way to castrate a fridge, you have to remove some mechanical parts.
The eggs are only content of the fridge and do not belong to the device itself.

I don't know how people can think it's funny

Drekkus
07-10-2008, 08:28:56
Do fridges have dingdings? What about frigid fridges?

MoSe
07-10-2008, 08:41:59
LOL @Drekkus
well Vinnie, instead of taking out eggs, you could take out the fridge's nuts
___

to add a subtext, you could think that "castrato" is also used as a shorthand in itself for a specific kind of meat in Italy, that is castrated mutton.

http://it.wikipedia.org/wiki/Castrato_(carne)
that is Hammel in german
http://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hausschaf
Hammel (Schöps): das männliche, kastrierte über ein Jahr alte Tier sowie weibliche Tiere, die noch nicht gelammt haben. Hammelfleisch ist kräftig im Geschmack, dunkelrot, fest und deutlich marmorie
and it's used for the Innsbruck version of a Sudtiroler recipe
http://it.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gr%C3%B6stl

Funko
07-10-2008, 09:11:20
Originally posted by C.G.B. Spender
But a fridge is a device and eggs do not belong to that device.
If there's a any way to castrate a fridge, you have to remove some mechanical parts.
The eggs are only content of the fridge and do not belong to the device itself.

I don't know how people can think it's funny

It's not your fault you can't understand

http://www.guardian.co.uk/world/2006/may/23/germany.features11

C.G.B. Spender
07-10-2008, 09:21:59
Proper jokes are realistic, not that british nonsense crap.
We have joke engineers over here!

Funko
07-10-2008, 09:24:14
Can you tell us a proper German joke please?

C.G.B. Spender
07-10-2008, 09:29:18
Sagt den Deutscher zu das Franzosen: "Händen weg von mein Fahrvergnügen, Schweinhund." und erschießt ihm.

(Tusch)

Nills Lagerbaak
07-10-2008, 09:32:02
Originally posted by Funko
Can you tell us a proper German joke please?


A German coast guard receives a distress call from a ship at sea: "Help help we are sinking..."

He replies: "Dass ist very interesting... Vot exactly are you sinking?"

Funko
07-10-2008, 09:36:41
Originally posted by C.G.B. Spender
Sagt den Deutscher zu das Franzosen: "Händen weg von mein Fahrvergnügen, Schweinhund." und erschießt ihm.

(Tusch)


:lol:

Greg W
07-10-2008, 12:00:43
That German says to Frenchmen: " Hands away of my driving pleasure, Schweinhund." and shoots it.:clueless:

mr_B
07-10-2008, 12:12:47
maybe loose some freon and the shranks voice will get allll girly and all, well I'm just guessing and all, so it might not be true butt then again it could be couldn't it
jesjes it couls, ask lurker he knows be cause he does doesn't he jesjes he doesn't and vinny on the other hand is not on the same hand but on the other hand. second hand maybe orrrr maybe not o/c well o/c o/c I'm not sure so o/c is not the proper word to use isn't it, jesjes it isn't

Bob
07-10-2008, 12:23:56
you're clearly wrong this time

mr_B
07-10-2008, 12:32:35
kewl

mr_B
07-10-2008, 12:32:57
let's celebrate

Dyl Ulenspiegel
07-10-2008, 12:34:40
Originally posted by mr_B
kewl

No eggs.

mr_B
07-10-2008, 12:45:42
TO MY EGGS!!!!!

LoD
07-10-2008, 14:44:01
Originally posted by Nills Lagerbaak
A German coast guard receives a distress call from a ship at sea: "Help help we are sinking..."

He replies: "Dass ist very interesting... Vot exactly are you sinking?"

It was an advert for a language school, and the response was "Vot... are you sinking about?".

Provost Harrison
09-10-2008, 20:53:43
I'll have to remember that one for next week when I am in Germany...do you think it will go down well?

LoD
09-10-2008, 21:30:24
No, but this one will:

"Wenn ist das Nunstück git und Slotermeyer? Ja! ... Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput."

MOBIUS
10-10-2008, 12:11:13
Originally posted by MoSe
If you take it out of its nest, does it lose its nature???????

Free range eggs?

MOBIUS
10-10-2008, 12:19:26
Originally posted by Provost Harrison
I'll have to remember that one for next week when I am in Germany...do you think it will go down well?

...like a sinking ship!

Badum tisch!:bounce:

MOBIUS
10-10-2008, 12:20:39
BTW PH, try out my infamous chat up line:

"Du bist ein kleine kartoffel":)

Funko
10-10-2008, 12:21:48
Did that work?

MOBIUS
10-10-2008, 12:30:06
Technically, no.

Funko
10-10-2008, 12:38:42
Technically?

C.G.B. Spender
10-10-2008, 12:41:26
Syntax error

MOBIUS
10-10-2008, 12:43:37
Well, whenever I have encountered German girls to use it on, I have always been in a relationship, so I haven't been able to 'consumate' the chat up line. So to speak...

However, initial indications were highly positive in that I've always got a good laugh out of it, and I've always been told that if you can get a girl to laugh, you're halfway there...:cute:

C.G.B. Spender
10-10-2008, 12:46:20
because "ein Kartoffel" is male?

MOBIUS
10-10-2008, 12:47:28
:lol:

See it gets funnier every time!

C.G.B. Spender
10-10-2008, 12:51:01
alter Kartoffel!

King_Ghidra
10-10-2008, 13:19:05
This is officially my most successful German joke thread ever

Venom
10-10-2008, 13:21:42
Originally posted by mr_B
TO MY EGGS!!!!!

Yes! TO MY EGGS!!!!

No someone tell me how to say it in German.

Bob
10-10-2008, 13:32:54
Arsch voll - toll!

King_Ghidra
10-10-2008, 13:38:31
Best shouted in a dark Hamburg alleyway

Venom
10-10-2008, 14:04:36
I know enough about German to know that's not correct.

Bob
10-10-2008, 14:06:20
It means it's great to be drunk, so it is correct ... in a way

Provost Harrison
10-10-2008, 19:53:57
Originally posted by MOBIUS
Badum tisch!:bounce:

How did you know the name of the town I was visiting? :eek:

Bob
10-10-2008, 19:56:04
did they like you?

Greg W
11-10-2008, 00:31:33
They drummed him out of town!