View Full Version : Overheard in New York

06-10-2007, 18:53:35
Good website:


Blond Tourist Bimbo: I've never even heard of the G Train.
Blond Local Bimbo: Yeah, it's a ghetto train.
Blond Tourist Bimbo: Where does it go?
Blond Local Bimbo: Nowhere.
Black eight-year-old boy: Except my home, bitch.

Tourist man: Pardon me, officer, can you tell us where Orchard Street is?
Cop: See that naked Chinese guy?
Tourist man: Ummm...Yeah.
Cop: Walk down to him and make a left.
Tourist man: Um, thanks.
Cop: No problem.

06-10-2007, 22:16:46
Stoner #1: Man, this is an awesome place to come and get stoned.
Stoner #2: Dude, totally. This is what John Lennon was all about.
Actual Lennon fan nearby: Shut the fuck up! This is sacred land! Do not make me get Yoko Ono to fuck you two up!
Stoner #1: Geez, calm down.
Stoner #2: Seriously. Like, give peace a chance or whatever.

self biased
07-10-2007, 08:34:54
Flight attendant: Of course, folks, I'm here to help you, so if you want anything just grab a hold of me as I walk by and I'll do my best to help you in any way I can.
Captain: And make sure you grab a tight hold, ladies and gents -- he's a wily one.


07-10-2007, 09:11:58
Brunette: I felt so bad for that cab driver yesterday.
Redhead: Yeah, I know! He was like, 'I've been here for seven years and I haven't done anything with my life...'
Brunette: Yeah, I know, and I'm like, 'Me, too... But I'm rich!'

Girl: ... And then I was like--
Guy, exhausted after 10 minutes of her chattering: --Are you on your knees?
Girl: What? No.
Guy: Then shut your mouth.

07-10-2007, 09:14:37
20-something girl: Seriously, I love it when guys cum on my face.
20-something guy: Really?
20-something girl: Yeah, you can ask anyone.

07-10-2007, 09:34:13
Angry girl: What do you mean you didn't fuck up?
Boyfriend: I didn't fuck up!
Angry girl: You got a stripper pregnant! You fucked up!

07-10-2007, 09:47:58
Bimbette: She was being such a bitch, and I was like, 'You catch more flies with honey than you do with a fly swatter, y'know.'
Boyfriend: Don't talk. Seriously. Just stand there and look hot, okay?

08-10-2007, 01:13:24
That last couple is Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie? =)

Dyl Ulenspiegel
08-10-2007, 07:54:11
If so, who was the Bimbette?

08-10-2007, 08:24:41
Jolie. Have you seen Tomb Raider? :bash:

08-10-2007, 08:36:47
20-something guy: I've never been to a professional sporting event.
Girl: Really?
20-something guy: Well, except for the Orioles...

--Freddy's Bar, Dean & 6th

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

08-10-2007, 09:50:34
haha missed that one :lol:

08-10-2007, 10:26:15