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View Full Version : Architecture: the sadistic profession


Lurker the Second
27-09-2007, 12:47:10
Had an architect over last night to go over a wish list of house renovation and remodeling ideas. Even doing it all above water, it will probably cost more to do what we want than the house did 13 years ago. I blame the architect, so I kicked her in the knees and threw stuff at her as she ran from the house.

Maybe under water is cheaper?

Resource Consumer
27-09-2007, 12:52:05
Adding another cardboard box on top of the existing one can't be that expensive!

C.G.B. Spender
27-09-2007, 12:56:11
You should rather write "profession".

Resource Consumer
27-09-2007, 12:57:31
to give employment to inverted commas?

mr_B
27-09-2007, 12:59:06
I love her already

and if you let me dooo di dooooo that djop it would cost you at least 3 times as much, so be glad.

C.G.B. Spender
27-09-2007, 13:00:08
plus you have to talk to an imbecile!

Funko
27-09-2007, 13:01:55
How much would it cost to buy a house as big as you are proposing to make yours?

mr_B
27-09-2007, 13:02:33
Originally posted by C.G.B. Spender
plus you have to talk to an imbecile! jesjes and that
so get on your knees and pray to god or Vincent.

C.G.B. Spender
27-09-2007, 13:03:11
"or" ??

Funko
27-09-2007, 13:03:12
what's the difference?

Venom
27-09-2007, 13:03:41
She probably gets 2 jobs a year. She has to charge a lot to feed that whore mouth of hers.

Funko
27-09-2007, 13:04:33
It'll end up costing more than the estimate anyway.

mr_B
27-09-2007, 13:07:55
Originally posted by Venom
She probably gets 2 jobs a year. She has to charge a lot to feed that whore mouth of hers. :lol:
hello mr. sensitive

mr_B
27-09-2007, 13:09:41
Originally posted by Funko
It'll end up costing more than the estimate anyway. jesjes for me it's mostly x1.5 / x2

Funko
27-09-2007, 13:10:31
I guess you work out the real estimate, then halve it so your commissioner doesn't think the project will be too expensive to go ahead with.

MoSe
27-09-2007, 13:10:42
pay her in hams

mr_B
27-09-2007, 13:11:13
no

just bad luck i guess

Funko
27-09-2007, 13:11:37
Can't be, with your brilliant business brain.

C.G.B. Spender
27-09-2007, 13:12:58
Originally posted by Funko
I guess you work out the real estimate, then halve it so your commissioner doesn't think the project will be too expensive to go ahead with. Hey, don't give away the IT project calculation secret!!!

mr_B
27-09-2007, 13:13:17
did I ever told you I am not that good at earning money?

spending on the other hand goes way well

Venom
27-09-2007, 13:13:31
Just like software development. It always takes at least %50 longer to do it than you estimated.

Funko
27-09-2007, 13:13:45
IT project calculation, estimate the time, then double it

and then it actually takes twice as long as that.

C.G.B. Spender
27-09-2007, 13:14:55
And it won't work

Funko
27-09-2007, 13:16:59
It will as long as no users use it.

C.G.B. Spender
27-09-2007, 13:17:29
in theory

Tizzy
27-09-2007, 13:18:17
It's always the users who break things.

MoSe
27-09-2007, 13:18:36
if you knew somethin won't work, then you could have at least make it fail in time!

C.G.B. Spender
27-09-2007, 13:18:54
in fact it will consume resources like a Keith and crash down every time you log off from the system

MoSe
27-09-2007, 13:19:26
Originally posted by Tizzy
It's always the users who break things.

luckily for the assurance guys, or they'd be unemployed

MoSe
27-09-2007, 13:21:17
how does the Euro1-Euro2-Euro3-Euro4 system translate in Keiths?

MDA
27-09-2007, 13:27:21
the money you save on plumbing is less than the increased cost of wiring the place safely

Funko
27-09-2007, 13:30:32
Originally posted by MoSe
if you knew somethin won't work, then you could have at least make it fail in time!

But... it's the last minute change requests from the clients that make it take twice as long and not work.

MoSe
27-09-2007, 13:33:31
AHA! it's your fault being such a wimp to accept them

C.G.B. Spender
27-09-2007, 13:33:48
And the errors in specifaction! Changed premises!

MoSe
27-09-2007, 13:35:23
SUDDENLY, Qweeg disappeared from CG (was he ever here?):
.FIR stopped working!!!!
:eek:

mr_B
27-09-2007, 13:37:44
so the conclusion to all of this is.

ICT SOCKS!!!
ARCHITECTURE RULEZZZZZ, big taaim

MoSe
27-09-2007, 13:38:58
what about "IT systems architecture"?

mr_B
27-09-2007, 13:39:47
what aboot that?

MoSe
27-09-2007, 13:41:50
it's all in the firmware and the EEEEEEEEPROM

Funko
27-09-2007, 13:42:36
Originally posted by MoSe
AHA! it's your fault being such a wimp to accept them

No, that's the sales team's fault.

MoSe
27-09-2007, 13:44:22
yeah, as we say: "it's easy to play being gay using someone else's ass"

C.G.B. Spender
27-09-2007, 13:47:58
IT is like architecture, but it doesn't have to work

Funko
27-09-2007, 13:49:38
So IT is like Dutch Architecture

mr_B
27-09-2007, 13:51:33
that was easy maaik

C.G.B. Spender
27-09-2007, 13:56:40
In general, it's more gay though

Lurker the Second
27-09-2007, 13:58:49
Originally posted by Funko
How much would it cost to buy a house as big as you are proposing to make yours?

We aren't even talking about adding on, except one "option" was to have the enclosed porch turned into a big giant kitchen. So the house wouldn't be any bigger, really.

mr.G would surely cost 3 times as much, if only because he'd have to deal with the local construction officials/inspectors and I'm sure the house would be condemned before he finished with them.

C.G.B. Spender
27-09-2007, 14:00:02
Ah, too bad. Say, have you thought of a nice little software project instead?

Lurker the Second
27-09-2007, 14:04:23
Yeah, I want to come up with software that allows you to reach through the internets and strangle someone far, far away.

Funko
27-09-2007, 14:04:51
Don't sell it to Venom

C.G.B. Spender
27-09-2007, 14:06:51
The basis technology already exists (World of Warcraft), we just need to develop a proper PvP2Player interface/hardware.

That shouldn't cost to much, let's say 250,000$

mr_B
27-09-2007, 14:12:12
Originally posted by Lurker the Second
Had an architect over last night to go over a wish list of house renovation and remodeling ideas. Even doing it all above water, it will probably cost more to do what we want than the house did 13 years ago. I blame the architect, so I kicked her in the knees and threw stuff at her as she ran from the house.

Maybe under water is cheaper? is she hot and married?

Lurker the Second
27-09-2007, 14:28:27
Naturally.

mr_B
27-09-2007, 14:42:34
kewl, gimme her number please.

mr_B
27-09-2007, 14:42:55
bet i starts wizz 555

Lurker the Second
27-09-2007, 14:50:00
She has broken knees and rotten tomatoes in her hair.

King_Ghidra
27-09-2007, 14:56:25
sounds like one of your exes

mr_B
27-09-2007, 15:49:39
Originally posted by Lurker the Second
She has broken knees and rotten tomatoes in her hair. aachga comfert sex and tomato licky licky woohoooo

Drekkus
28-09-2007, 10:16:56
Originally posted by C.G.B. Spender
IT is like architecture, but it doesn't have to work
http://oriana.nomadlife.org/hello/353488/640/HowProjectsFunction-2005.07.10-05.13.56.jpg

Venom
28-09-2007, 12:14:24
At the tech conference in Malaysia a guy showed those pictures as part of his presentation.

Funko
28-09-2007, 12:16:47
Must have been a lot of fun.

Venom
28-09-2007, 12:19:03
That was probably a highligh of the trip. Which should tell you a lot.

Venom
28-09-2007, 12:19:41
Also, he was a microsoft employe, so he should know a lot about that kind of thing.

Funko
28-09-2007, 12:21:08
He missed off "the amount we make the suckers pay for it"

Drekkus
28-09-2007, 12:34:21
I like the one about how the business consultant described it

C.G.B. Spender
28-09-2007, 12:44:07
I always prefered the "how it was documented" picture. That's big truth

Lurker the Second
28-09-2007, 13:29:24
Took me a while to figure out what was wrong with the second one.

Venom
28-09-2007, 13:38:26
Originally posted by Funko
He missed off "the amount we make the suckers pay for it"

No he didn't. It's the roller coaster picture.

Dyl Ulenspiegel
28-09-2007, 14:57:28
Originally posted by Drekkus
http://oriana.nomadlife.org/hello/353488/640/HowProjectsFunction-2005.07.10-05.13.56.jpg

Hmm... how many of these have been designed by mrG?

The Mad Monk
28-09-2007, 15:38:26
Depends.

How many government contracts has he done?

Dyl Ulenspiegel
28-09-2007, 18:25:43
I don't think that makes any difference for mrG.

mr_B
29-09-2007, 21:43:03
no not at all