View Full Version : Happy Left-Handers Day

13-08-2007, 14:07:17

The number of left-handers has increased steadily since 1910, when it was thought there were only 3% in Western society, and schoolchildren were forced to use their right hands. The fact there are now 13% in the UK suggests a weakening of the taboo.

C.G.B. Spender
13-08-2007, 14:11:41
How gay they are!

13-08-2007, 14:32:33
ok, i'm doin' it all left handed today!

13-08-2007, 14:35:05

Lurker the Second
13-08-2007, 14:50:08
The problem with lefthandedness is that it puts a tremendous amount of social stress on youngsters. So they become very poor judges of character and almost all of them end up dating mass murderers. FACT!

13-08-2007, 16:23:45
I'm not left-handed, but I like left-handed cigarettes.

13-08-2007, 16:39:06
I just ran 4 miles left handed!

In March, a strongly-worded e-petition was submitted to Downing Street calling upon the government to apologise for the continued oppression of left-handed people and "to legislate to end the discrimination - particularly in the manufacture of tools - that causes thousands of needless injuries to left-handed people every year". It collected a fairly unimpressive 44 signatures.


all 44 signatures were smeared so badly as to be illegible

13-08-2007, 16:44:17
This just proves we should beat teenagers regularly.

13-08-2007, 16:46:54
Mrs Milsom's husband, Keith, who owns the shop Anything Left-Handed, says his father Reg had his knuckles rapped with a ruler at school in the 1930s if he wrote with his left hand. The teacher even tied his left arm to his chair. The experience brought on a stutter.

Hello Keith!

Provost Harrison
13-08-2007, 17:40:24
How very sinister...

13-08-2007, 20:58:09
I'm left handed. Therefore I rule.

13-08-2007, 23:50:28
As a left-hander, I can't tell you the number of times I've tried to open a microwave oven and failed, had serious trouble trying to cut a piece of paper with Facist-inspired scissors, or even tied my hands in a knot trying to sign a reciept with a chained pen in a bank. It's a miracle most left-handed people make it through the day without serious injury. I think the government should consider tax credits to compensate us for the daily oppression and disadvantage we have to undergo. Thank goodness organisations such as the Left-Handed Club exist to raise awareness of our suffering.
Lucy Martin, Berkshire

I am glad this person said that so I didn't have to.

14-08-2007, 00:20:57
I'm left handed but I've never had trouble opening a microwave or any of that other stuff. It's pretty easy to adapt if you try.

Greg W
14-08-2007, 01:44:21
I remember visiting a castle in Wales, and the tour guide asked us why 7 of the tower stairways went up anti clockwise, and the eighth went up clockwise. I got bonus points for being the only one to answer that 1 in 8 of the population must have been left handed, and that the towers were organised that way so that a defender would have his shield on the arm nearest the center of the tower in order to defend better.

And 1 in 8 is basically 13%. So, this tells us that the Welsh knew this years ago, and the rest of the brits are only slowly catching on now. :beer:

C.G.B. Spender
14-08-2007, 06:47:47
all left handers should be killed. it's an abomination. An aberration.

When the Son of man shall come in his glory, and all the holy angels with him, then shall he sit upon the throne of his glory.And before him shall be gathered all nations: and he shall separate them one from another, as a shepherd divideth sheep from the goats. And he shall set the sheep on his right hand, but the goats on the left. Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world.

14-08-2007, 08:19:51
I was really confused by the "opening a microwave" thing too, I don't understand how that can be that difficult.
I have had disagreements with "stupid right handed" scissors and things over the years though. My main gripe for years was with potato peelers. So my grandpa bought me one which could be used left or right handed and I discovered I'm even worse trying to do it left handed :D

14-08-2007, 10:14:52
as my uncle uses to say, he's at the same time both-handed and ham-handed, so he claims to be bothamhanded


C.G.B. Spender
14-08-2007, 10:18:33
What is the name of your uncle?

14-08-2007, 10:19:10
Marcello Michelangeli

C.G.B. Spender
14-08-2007, 10:22:37
Ah, OK

15-08-2007, 19:57:58

In 2007, researchers discovered LRRTM1, the first gene linked to increased odds of being left-handed. The researchers also claim that possessing this gene slightly raises the risk of psychotic mental illnesses such as schizophrenia.

15-08-2007, 23:04:53
and schoolchildren were forced to use their right hands.

That's what happened to me...:(

But apparently they weren't watching at lunchtime...:D

Greg W
16-08-2007, 00:52:43
No pretty teachers, so you did all your wanking at lunchtime?

16-08-2007, 08:59:02
They were nuns:gasmaske:

16-08-2007, 10:21:02
Ah. Lesbians.

16-08-2007, 11:32:30
My microwave opens by pushing a big button. No idea if it's a right or left handed button though.

16-08-2007, 11:39:54
Yeah, so does ours. If the button was on the left I could easily open it left handed.

16-08-2007, 11:49:18
I can safely operate it right handed. And if I can do it, it can't be that difficult.

C.G.B. Spender
16-08-2007, 11:52:00
Sounds like quite an adventure, owning a microwave!

17-08-2007, 07:13:09
Microwning 101

17-08-2007, 22:14:21
Toilet flushers are usually on the left side. Frankly that's racist.

17-08-2007, 23:37:41
My mum is left handed, my gran was left handed, in fact she was forced to write with her er right so she was good with both hands (I guess my grand-dad like that as well!), I do have some right-handedness in me from my fathers side, but it mostly seems only related to violence or violent activites (ie punching, shooting, possibly stabbing etc).