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Beta1
06-05-2007, 10:00:18
Went paintballing yesterday. First game I went straight over a tree root and took the skin of the back of one of my fingers. So next game I got my gloves on. Right at the beginning of the game I lit a smoke grenade... The fuse burned rather more fiercely than I expected and I managed to set fire to my glove. I lobbed the greande away so I could stop my hand burning. Then realise because I hadnt waited for the smoke to start before lobbing it the burning fuse had set fire to the leaves it had landed on.

I now have a nice large blister on the end of one finger and a glove with a finger missing....

I also have a very large number of perfectly circular bruises...

Dyl Ulenspiegel
06-05-2007, 10:05:01
Good work. Next step: DIY la Laz.

Greg W
06-05-2007, 10:15:31
The funny thing with paintball bruises from what I remember is that you end up with a ring bruise.

Debaser
06-05-2007, 11:09:12
Are you sure it was paintballing Greg? What KG calls 'paintballing' isn't the same as what everyone else calls "paintballing". Bruised ring injuries are pretty uncommon.

Lazarus and the Gimp
06-05-2007, 11:30:26
Greg plays the "Prison bitch" variant of paintballing.

Lazarus and the Gimp
06-05-2007, 11:32:24
I love paintballing. The problem is that loads of people take it seriously, whereas I treat every game like I'm in the closing scene of "Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid". Unless you go out in a blaze of glory, you miss out on most of the fun.

JM^3
06-05-2007, 16:14:57
I never did smoke grenades, but Paintball is great fun. I Didn't play last year though.

Jon Miller

Greg W
07-05-2007, 09:52:26
A ring bruise, not a bruised ring. Kinda like this:

http://static.flickr.com/19/113604753_6619560ef6_m.jpg

Beta1
07-05-2007, 10:02:17
yup got a few of those

Drekkus
07-05-2007, 10:14:57
Octopus hicky

MoSe
07-05-2007, 10:31:01
Nova Burst with Debris Halo

APOD worthy

Skanky Burns
07-05-2007, 11:09:25
My cousin went paintballing once, but a few people didn't make it so his group was put in with another group playing that day. Unfortunately for his group, the other team were crack SAS soldiers.

MDA
07-05-2007, 11:19:57
Aredhran would be proud!

Koshko
07-05-2007, 18:07:21
It would have been funnier if you were nailed in the balls.

Lurker the Second
07-05-2007, 18:40:11
No pics, please.

JM^3
07-05-2007, 18:47:57
I saw someone get nailed in the balls once, they puked.

JM

MDA
08-05-2007, 13:14:18
That's funny.

Drekkus
08-05-2007, 13:24:04
You're shooting paint when paintballing, right? Not nails?

MoSe
08-05-2007, 13:25:29
painted nails, nine inch long

Drekkus
08-05-2007, 13:53:57
nailgun gaming would give a slightly higher adrenaline level.

MoSe
08-05-2007, 13:55:36
noguns, you have to scratch

King_Ghidra
08-05-2007, 15:14:57
Originally posted by Skanky Burns
My cousin went paintballing once, but a few people didn't make it so his group was put in with another group playing that day. Unfortunately for his group, the other team were crack SAS soldiers.

a great true story i'm sure

get funko to tell you the jean claude van damme story some time

Funko
08-05-2007, 15:24:53
Also sounds like the time we played the Senegal Olympic football team in the park?

Venom
08-05-2007, 15:27:13
I have now heard the Van Damme story. I can totally believe it because I've heard similar stories about Van Damme getting owned because he thinks he's so bad.

The shitting himself thing might be hard to believe, but I suppose it's possible.

Drekkus
08-05-2007, 15:41:23
I want to know the van damme story as well.

Funko
08-05-2007, 15:41:45
You can't handle it.

Drekkus
08-05-2007, 15:43:26
why not?

MOBIUS
08-05-2007, 15:45:31
If you want paintball bruises, try Electrowerkz indoor paintball in London - all hits usually occur within 10ft due to the nature of the playing space, which is normally not allowed in the outdoor games cos it hurts like fuck!

I was literally bruised for over a month after playing there! Good fun though!:D

MOBIUS
08-05-2007, 15:47:02
Originally posted by Lazarus and the Gimp
I love paintballing. The problem is that loads of people take it seriously, whereas I treat every game like I'm in the closing scene of "Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid". Unless you go out in a blaze of glory, you miss out on most of the fun.

Only way to play!:)

Also cheap too.

JM^3
08-05-2007, 18:04:03
One of the times I played, there were a group of USMC playing. They would invariably charge into devestating fire...

JOn Miller

Lazarus and the Gimp
08-05-2007, 18:35:20
The most dangerous paintballers are 8-year-old kids. They can hide behind twigs, and clumps of grass. They have reflexes honed by weeks on end of Nintendo- and you can't shoot them without feeling guilty.

Venom
08-05-2007, 19:09:14
Maybe you can't.

Lurker the Second
08-05-2007, 19:32:52
:lol:

JM^3
08-05-2007, 19:44:55
my experience with 8 year old ids is that they won't take any risks... This makes them a liability on the field.

JM

MOBIUS
08-05-2007, 20:09:24
Originally posted by Lazarus and the Gimp
The most dangerous paintballers are 8-year-old kids. They can hide behind twigs, and clumps of grass. They have reflexes honed by weeks on end of Nintendo- and you can't shoot them without feeling guilty.

I seriously considered pistol-whipping (I mentally had to hold myself back!) a young kid who blatantly cheated and shot me in a game of quasar (laser tag game)...

I happily pour round after round into the cheating bastards who get hit and wipe the paint off pretending they haven't been shot...:D

Not dead yet, huh?:shoot: :shoot: :shoot:

Lazarus and the Gimp
08-05-2007, 20:19:26
I see you're in touch with your inner psychopath.

Oerdin
08-05-2007, 21:49:05
I once went rogue paintballing with some little fuckers who were a friend of a friend's younger brother. There were about 30 of us playing on the MOUNT (Urban Combat Training Course) at Camp Pendleton, California where the Marines do their urban assault training. Basically the course is always there so people on the base often go there to play paint ball. My problem was I had one of those cheap pump loading paint ball guns which fired one paint ball at a time while the competition had fully automatic paint ball machine guns. What's worse was the little shits turned up the pressure way above the agreed upon 100 PSI so that when you got hit you'd get a large welt and a buise which would last for weeks.

Then there was the fact that the little fuckers would normally shoot you 4-8 times after you had already said you were hit and out. :angry: Plus it didn't help that it was a hot day and the outer skin of all my paint balls melted and the balls would explode in the gun's barrel. :bored:

Oerdin
08-05-2007, 21:52:58
I never saw any SAS but they do have lots of military around here who love to play paint ball. The Navy Seals train at Coronado just across the bay and those guys used to hang out at the paint ball parks all the time. The same with the Marine Force Recon guys from Pendleton.

JM^3
08-05-2007, 23:35:00
100 PSI isn't that high.

"pump loading paint ball guns" :lol: I think I have seen someone use those like once. Even the semi-automatic ones mostly just get used by noobs.

I had a nice one that could fire in automatic or semi-automatic. I generally used semi-automatic because the balls were more often on target with that.

At least with the guns I have had.. it is anything liquid (including other paintballs) that cause the paintballs to explode in a gun. If you have a missfire, you are suppose to carefully clear out your barrel before firing again. I had something to carry with me to clean in out with.

Jon Miller

Drekkus
09-05-2007, 07:44:03
Originally posted by Venom
Maybe you can't. :lol: Took me a second you get the right emphasis. :D

Wasn't venom some semi-professional paintballer once?

Funko
09-05-2007, 08:15:20
He was on the team that won the state championship.

JM^3
09-05-2007, 09:06:02
Wow, that is really cool. Link?

What gun did you use? What was it like?

Jon Miller

MoSe
09-05-2007, 10:05:01
I'm amazed he could be considered professional to any extent.

I'd have sworn he'd only do it for his sheer presonal pleasure.

Funko
09-05-2007, 10:11:52
You must be thinking of when he won the state championship for wanking.

MOBIUS
09-05-2007, 10:23:04
Originally posted by Funko
You must be thinking of when he won the state championship for wanking.

"I had a nice one that could fire in automatic or semi-automatic. I generally used semi-automatic because the balls were more often on target with that."

Perhaps we have more than one state championship winner...:cute:

King_Ghidra
09-05-2007, 10:29:31
x-fear! :shoot:

MoSe
09-05-2007, 10:44:36
X-eyed Fear!!!

(i.e.: .... too much wanking....)

MOBIUS
09-05-2007, 10:55:12
I was worried that someone wouldn't be able to make the reference. I have been damaged by Poly...

Bob
09-05-2007, 10:56:54
shame on you

Venom
09-05-2007, 12:18:07
Why yes I was on team. Hence my ability to shoot any opponent multiple times from point blank range.

King_Ghidra
09-05-2007, 12:24:53
did you ever shoot a team-mate multiple times from point-blank range

Venom
09-05-2007, 12:38:11
I have shot a team-mate in the back of the head before.

King_Ghidra
09-05-2007, 12:42:25
:beer:

MoSe
09-05-2007, 12:44:48
standing or grounded?

Venom
09-05-2007, 12:54:23
Kneeling behind a bunker. I was shooting over him. Got a little too low with some shots. Ooops.