PDA

View Full Version : Let's make it an official day off work at work day


Drekkus
27-04-2007, 07:10:19
I'm going to try to do no work today at work.

Bob
27-04-2007, 07:11:42
I'm two steps ahead of you. I'm desperatly trying to do some work at work, but there is none!

Bob
27-04-2007, 07:14:24
I'm reading this at the moment:

Since many years, all the managers are frantically cost cutting to save their souls. What can be saved additionally? This book provides a new gold mine: Save intelligence! Don’t pay high salaries to white collar academics anymore. Start to organize all your enterprise work flow in the manner of no-brainers. If all the work is utmost stupidified and simplified, the modern enterprise can even try to educate its customers to do all the necessary work themselves – for the honor of a platinum status, say. The lean brain enterprise delivers lean brain quality without any compromise.

Today’s work is very complicated – most people waste their time fixing work flow problems which have been originated by superfluous intelligence. Lean Brain Management avoids intelligence in all facets of our life. This book advises to transform the society. Minimal intelligence in politics, universities, schools, economics, and everywhere! It is completely sufficient that any human can talk about any topic in the world – after 30 minutes googling and typing three to five presentation slides in another 30 minutes.

http://www.springer.com/dal/home/business/business+for+professionals?SGWID=1-166-22-173734685-0

Drekkus
27-04-2007, 07:17:07
wow, that's great stuff! It's like online banking, you do everything yourself, and they charge you for it

Drekkus
27-04-2007, 07:18:06
Oh, scheisse, I forgot a conference call I have in 15 minutes. :(

BUT I WON'T LISTEN AND WON'T PARTICIPATE IN THE DISCUSSION!!! HA!

Bob
27-04-2007, 07:18:15
Excellent book. He calls the process "moronization"

Bob
27-04-2007, 07:45:37
Originally posted by Drekkus
Oh, scheisse, I forgot a conference call I have in 15 minutes. :(

BUT I WON'T LISTEN AND WON'T PARTICIPATE IN THE DISCUSSION!!! HA!
Amateur! Pick a minor detail and start a BIG HUGE fuss about it. Waste valuable meeting time so that the major points have to be discussed in the remaining five minutes - with catastrophic results.

Drekkus
27-04-2007, 07:48:34
other people do that already. i'm in the conference right now

Bob
27-04-2007, 07:51:10
So you just have to do a :drekkus: when the discussion about the minor details stops?

"So, in summary, what was it? Have we agreed on this one - just for the record ..."

Drekkus
27-04-2007, 07:58:39
What always works is to say: 'in relation to what was said about this topic, I like to add [followed by something that has nothing to do with it at all]'. The discussion then follows the new point, leaving the old discussion without proper ending.

Bob
27-04-2007, 08:03:01
I want to go back to the point we discussed at the beginning ...

Tizzy
27-04-2007, 08:14:04
What's the point in having a day off work at work?

Bob
27-04-2007, 08:17:21
money

Drekkus
27-04-2007, 08:18:20
too late

Debaser
27-04-2007, 08:36:43
Quickly read Evel Knievel's Wikipedia page, and then try to talk like you live your life like him for the rest of the call: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Evel_Knievel

Drekkus
27-04-2007, 08:44:48
Try to talk like what??

Debaser
27-04-2007, 08:49:33
Like you're Evel Knievel, the worlds greatest bad 70s stuntman.

Drekkus
27-04-2007, 08:55:32
How does he talk? What does he sound like? What stuntman lingo can i use?

Great story though, especially the bit where he attacked a reporter with a baseball bat for saying he was beating his wife.

Dyl Ulenspiegel
27-04-2007, 09:01:37
"Minimal intelligence in politics"

Now there's a real no-brainer.

MoSe
27-04-2007, 09:38:30
Alas, minimal means that a tiny amount is still allways required

Funko
27-04-2007, 09:40:52
I have done loads of work today.

Bob
27-04-2007, 10:15:36
Sucker

Dyl Ulenspiegel
27-04-2007, 10:18:27
work or "work"?

MoSe
27-04-2007, 10:20:55
he's still trying to work it out

Drekkus
27-04-2007, 10:27:02
Loads of work doesn't mean you did a lot of work.