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JM^3
21-11-2006, 11:41:52
I am a bit confused about what some of you do for a living.

I am a research assistant. Sometimes I work hard, sometimes I don't.

JM

Tizzy
21-11-2006, 11:52:19
I get paid for being an Application Support Analyst although most days it seems that only requires interweb surfing.

Scabrous Birdseed
21-11-2006, 11:56:00
I'm unemployed and have been since I finished my Journalism degree last june. From january through may I was placed in a work experience programme, co-ordniating the exhibition activities of a youth centre.

Things are looking up a bit, I've got a job interview in Stockholm the week after next, and possibly another project (properly paid this time) that I could potentially be involved in after christmas.

MDA
21-11-2006, 11:58:46
I'm currently working on a PhD, studying how software bugs facilitate the development of online communities.

...or I work at the US Food and Drug Administration

JM^3
21-11-2006, 12:01:42
I am still confused by Tizzy's job.

JM

Fistandantilus
21-11-2006, 12:03:23
She's confused too.

King_Ghidra
21-11-2006, 12:04:32
Software Test Team Leader

Tizzy
21-11-2006, 12:11:06
Originally posted by JM^3
I am still confused by Tizzy's job.

JM

You, me and the rest of the world.

(in theory if something goes wrong with any of the Finance applications in the company, I fix them.
However I hardly ever do any of that, at the moment I'm spending most of my actual work time fixing errors between 2 systems and developing very very simple Sharepoint sites)

edit: make that 3 systems. It's been a steep learning curve today.

mr_G
21-11-2006, 12:13:42
I'm just brilliantly brilliant.....and modest

Skanky Burns
21-11-2006, 12:29:48
I type stuff and order parts and tell others to do work.

maroule
21-11-2006, 12:36:13
headhunter for software editors and consultancies

Venom
21-11-2006, 12:48:58
My job is avoiding doing work.

mr_G
21-11-2006, 12:53:15
and being a giver

Mr. Bas
21-11-2006, 12:53:41
I'm working on a Ph. D. at the moment, or at least, I would if I wasn't posting here. Theory of condensed matter, I'm mostly working on exciton transport in and optical response of molecular chains.

So, what exactly does a research assistant do? Is that something like a Ph.D. or M.Sc. research project, or completely something else?

JM^3
21-11-2006, 12:58:11
Oh, yeah, I am working on my PhD also. It means that I am not teaching classes for money, rather I devote all my time to my PhD experiment.

My actual experiment is to calculate GeN at a few different Q^2 values.

Jon Miller

JM^3
21-11-2006, 12:59:57
I tried to do Condensed Matter Theory for a bit, didn't work out with the only Professor that I wanted to work for (Ted Kirkpatrick, because he was doing interesting stuff).

Jon Miller
(a good part of it was my fault, but it didn't help matters that I was too scared to talk to him)

mr_G
21-11-2006, 13:02:48
:lol:

JM^3
21-11-2006, 13:05:14
It is important to be able to talk to your advisor - FACT

JM

mr_G
21-11-2006, 13:05:58
:lol:

jesjes communication is important

Mr. Bas
21-11-2006, 13:07:11
Talking to your prof does indeed help. ;)

Now, what is GeN and what is Q^2?

mr_G
21-11-2006, 13:07:19
ted kirkpatrick scary scary man (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ted_Kirkpatrick)

Mr. Bas
21-11-2006, 13:08:28
What's wrong with butterflies?

JM^3
21-11-2006, 13:09:24
GeN is the electric form factor of the neutron

you can rewrite the dirac and pauli form factors as magnetic and electric ones

Q^2 is the transfered 4 momentum

JM

mr_G
21-11-2006, 13:11:38
Go to work Jon

Mr. Bas
21-11-2006, 13:14:46
You've got the wrong Kirkpatrick. Stjoepit miester gee.

mr_G
21-11-2006, 13:17:08
so my new avatar is not the scary scary ted kirkpatrick?

Mr. Bas
21-11-2006, 13:17:52
Own goal. No, and neither of the two is JM's would-be advisor.

JM^3
21-11-2006, 13:35:02
I think he is a nice enough guy.. I was just too scared to talk to him.

JM

Drekkus
21-11-2006, 14:07:52
I'm an advisor of some sort. Sadly enough no one listens to my advice

Funko
21-11-2006, 14:12:05
They listen, then do the opposite.

mr_G
21-11-2006, 14:19:04
Originally posted by Drekkus
I'm an advisor of some sort. Sadly enough no one listens to my advice I did once i guess

Funko
21-11-2006, 14:20:53
Even morons only listen to his advice once.

Drekkus
21-11-2006, 14:26:50
Originally posted by mr_G
I did once i guess when was that?

Fistandantilus
21-11-2006, 14:27:34
That quote from Tizzy in mr_G sig... he made that up right?

Funko
21-11-2006, 14:29:01
I guess MrG means you advised him to come here.

If I'm right, I guess he makes perfect sense.

mr_G
21-11-2006, 14:43:03
:lol:

Unregistered
21-11-2006, 15:01:49
I thought it was girl advice.

Drekkus
21-11-2006, 17:17:21
girly advice maybe

Oerdin
21-11-2006, 20:38:58
Bridge building advice.

Chris
21-11-2006, 21:05:35
Its my job to spread sunshine and hapiness throughout the net.

Diss
22-11-2006, 00:34:29
classified. Or I'm just to embarrassed to say.

I'm a technician. But they usually get me to do any bullshit work. I used to do a lot of IT work, but now they finally hired an IT guy. Even though it's less work for me, I kind of feel less needed now. :(.

Debaser
22-11-2006, 00:46:28
I make pretty car dealership adverts for exciting publications like Autotrader. Usually in the middle of the night.

devilmunchkin
22-11-2006, 06:03:40
i used to work as a computer software tech, technical/professional writer, webdesigner, patient account management, insurance biller and anything else you can think of at my old job.

Now I'm a graduate student research assistant and a ta.

Oerdin
22-11-2006, 07:01:07
I tell polluting scum bag cock suckers how to clean up their mess and avoid paying most of the fines for their misdeeds. I charge them up the ass to do so.

HelloKitty
22-11-2006, 08:23:37
I listen to whiney undergrads, who think they are smart enough to get into medical school, complain that intro to physiology (or any other class) is too hard and will ruin their chance to get into med school. I also spend a good deal of time listening to them beg me not to put the fact they were caught cheating on their records and fail thier asses.

I am supposed to do something like coordinate classes, set up lecturers, help with admissions, write/maintain/update two labs, and sometimes even teach.

I don't seem to do much of that though.

Although because of short staffing, I have been coordinating a class for the M3 and M4 students of the college of medicine. Being able to get away from campus and hide in the luxureous offices of the hospital center and deal with people who were smart enough to get into med school, and have already passed their first step of boards, is refreshing.

Plus I get a nametag that says Dr and staff on it that entitles me to 40% off at the cafe and a pager that never goes off since there aren't many medical emergencies that I have to (or can for that matter)deal with, unless one of the students gets a bad paper cut taking a test or something.

The bad things are I get to expain to confused guests (i.e. patients who survived something terrible and are coming to be poked at by the med students) that yes, the college of medicine does in fact hire some doctors that are NOT physicians. IN fact we have PhDs, a PsyD, PhardDs, a Dental Surgeon, and for some reason a Master of Divinity..., and that NO, I don't have any suggestions on that rash on their ass and they should see a physician. Then they say "Oh, you're not a real doctor". Is it wrong to wish cancer on a person who is coming to talk about surviving a brain tumor?

If I have to do this next year I may demand a white coat to wear around to further confuse people.

It also sucks that the hospital filters the interweb...

JM^3
22-11-2006, 09:29:55
Yeah, I noticed that PreMeds weren't always very smart when I TAed for them in my sophmore year of undergrad.

JM

MOBIUS
22-11-2006, 13:14:26
I think I am supposed to be managing a project, but it's a bit difficult when it already went tits up before I got here - I hope they don't actually expect me to fix it!?:eek:

mr_G
22-11-2006, 13:17:23
tits went up???

MDA
22-11-2006, 13:28:50
we don't actually expect project managers to fix anything - they're just there to nag the people that know how to do the job :p

Tizzy
22-11-2006, 13:31:30
I could do that....

Mr. Bas
22-11-2006, 13:32:19
Master of Divinity sounds cool.

Funko
22-11-2006, 13:33:13
Master of Divinity, Fear and Illusion - Mandrake!

Gramercy Riffs
22-11-2006, 13:34:30
I'm an Artists Services Officer for Copyright and Licensing of their works.

King_Ghidra
22-11-2006, 13:39:08
aka friend to the stars and inhabiter of trendy london boozers

Gramercy Riffs
22-11-2006, 13:51:18
aka hearing them moan about how they have no money, then flipently reply "is that all?" when you give them the good news that you've got "only" 30,000 for them.

Even harder to bear when you think their work is utter dogshit.

MOBIUS
22-11-2006, 14:51:34
Originally posted by Tizzy
I could do that....

Anybody could do that - hence why I am doing it!

mr_G
22-11-2006, 14:55:21
yaay tell us willem

Funko
22-11-2006, 15:10:42
G_willem

mr_G
22-11-2006, 15:13:29
:lol:

Lazarus and the Gimp
22-11-2006, 22:44:20
Ummm.......projects. Mostly involving preventing financial crimes. It's a sort of training/business analyst/troubleshooter thing.

Greg W
22-11-2006, 23:50:44
Me, I drive busses.

MattHiggs
23-11-2006, 08:37:24
I'm an IT Technician at a higher education college. I also do some web design on the side.

Dyl Ulenspiegel
23-11-2006, 10:24:12
I'm a law professor, teaching little satans how to suck the blood out of the unhappy subjects of the law.

King_Ghidra
23-11-2006, 10:27:40
and mercilessly exploiting the hot young blonde students in exchange for higher grades

Fistandantilus
23-11-2006, 10:39:35
looks like a great job indeed

Dyl Ulenspiegel
23-11-2006, 11:13:49
Almost as good as Master of Divinity.

MoSe
23-11-2006, 12:53:13
Originally posted by Fistandantilus
She's confused too.

"Application Support Analyst"
it's the one who comes in your kitchen, looks carefully at your wall, and then advices you where the supports for your shelves have to be applied

Like they use to say: "If space is curved..... how do you fit the shelves???"

MoSe
23-11-2006, 13:08:30
Originally posted by MOBIUS
Anybody could do that - hence why I am doing it!

No, I NEVER could really do that.

while I LOVE to DECIDE how other people have to work (of course because it they do it my way it would be easier for them and everyting will be alrigth for everybody :coolgrin: ), and I did it indeed for a while, writing and helping to negotiate internal policies and procedures...
..and while I love the concept of a project, organizing several resources keeping in mind goals and objectives, seeing the greater picture, devising a masterplan involving several intertwining activities, exploiting every obscure quirk of MS Project :D ...

... I NEVER will accept to take on the responsibility of someone else flouting the deadlines they had committed to!
:nervous:

that's why I rather chose to play SMAX :D

Lazarus and the Gimp
23-11-2006, 17:03:38
Originally posted by MDA
we don't actually expect project managers to fix anything - they're just there to nag the people that know how to do the job :p


Project managers are my prey. I break them.

Timing is everything. You've got to let them settle in, play their big Powerpoints, lay out the grand design., and then take their foot off the pedal a bit to move into "enforcement" mode. Then you say, "You do realise that what you're proposing is illegal, don't you?".

Beta1
23-11-2006, 18:47:07
I shout at kids for a living.

C.G.B. Spender
23-11-2006, 23:29:42
I'm an oldschool application developer

Vincent
23-11-2006, 23:35:42
Some of you may think it sounds boring and sad but in fact it IS boring and sad.

Sir Penguin
23-11-2006, 23:39:25
I'm dragging my feet, finishing a B.Sc. in computer science. I have a 12-month work term starting in January, where I'll be working with a C4ISR system at General Dynamics Canada.

SP

Chris
24-11-2006, 01:36:01
Originally posted by King_Ghidra
and mercilessly exploiting the hot young blonde students in exchange for higher grades And those guys are not happy about it.

Qaj the Fuzzy Love Worm
24-11-2006, 01:40:22
I'm not sure what I do anymore. I just like the fact I'm paid more than everyone else I work with.

MoSe
24-11-2006, 08:33:52
hmmm.... what can that be....

a scapegoat?
a stuffed turkey?

Provost Harrison
26-11-2006, 16:13:18
I'm not sure what I do anymore. It's something to do with implementing SAP now, I think, from a quality management perspective :D

Resource Consumer
26-11-2006, 19:25:43
OK, here goes. I am a market analyst for a large commodity producing firm. In particulsr, I run the analysis of energy related activities - coal, uranium plus oil, gas and other energy related crap.

In short - "planet raping capitalist bastard" as you all well know

Noisy
26-11-2006, 23:05:35
I look at client's data that they need to move to new systems, and tell them that their perfect legacy database isn't actually as perfect as they thought.

Scabrous Birdseed
27-11-2006, 08:40:05
Originally posted by Resource Consumer
OK, here goes. I am a market analyst for a large commodity producing firm. In particulsr, I run the analysis of energy related activities - coal, uranium plus oil, gas and other energy related crap.

In short - "planet raping capitalist bastard" as you all well know

One of the more infamous ones too, if you read the "alternative" press, which I used to do as a teenager. :D

Funko
27-11-2006, 09:05:59
Originally posted by Provost Harrison
I'm not sure what I do anymore. It's something to do with implementing SAP now, I think, from a quality management perspective :D

I know of many people who are "implementing SAP", never heard of anyone who actually completed the job though.

mr_G
27-11-2006, 09:11:29
Soft Anal Plugs?

Scabrous Birdseed
27-11-2006, 09:12:20
If it's soft, what's the point?

King_Ghidra
27-11-2006, 10:24:21
well said

mr_G
27-11-2006, 10:56:41
ok ok the man with experience has spoken.

Resource Consumer
27-11-2006, 11:19:43
Originally posted by Scabrous Birdseed
One of the more infamous ones too, if you read the "alternative" press, which I used to do as a teenager. :D

In the past, I would say that was true and the reputation was deserved. However, in recent years "ethics" etc has taken a big hold.:)

Scabrous Birdseed
27-11-2006, 11:50:18
You mean you say "sorry" now after shooting native protestors? ;)

Lazarus and the Gimp
27-11-2006, 17:52:09
I used to have to run picket lines of people demonstrating against RC's lot in order to get into our offices (in the same building).

MDA
27-11-2006, 18:38:33
link or he never raped the planet!

Resource Consumer
27-11-2006, 19:01:54
Originally posted by Lazarus and the Gimp
I used to have to run picket lines of people demonstrating against RC's lot in order to get into our offices (in the same building).

Castlemead?

Resource Consumer
27-11-2006, 19:02:24
Originally posted by Scabrous Birdseed
You mean you say "sorry" now after shooting native protestors? ;)

Yep. Actually, that was CRA who were the Australian forerunners :)

Lazarus and the Gimp
27-11-2006, 22:17:19
Originally posted by Resource Consumer
Castlemead?

Yup.

paiktis
27-11-2006, 23:21:21
a let's not jinx it

Resource Consumer
28-11-2006, 10:08:51
Originally posted by Lazarus and the Gimp
Yup.

Only been there twice - stuck on top of a car park surrounded by a motorway is how it feels :)

Lazarus and the Gimp
28-11-2006, 19:00:15
That was some years back- I don't work there any more. The views were nice.

Dyl Ulenspiegel
28-11-2006, 19:31:15
And you're a better corporate whore for it?

Provost Harrison
28-11-2006, 19:39:35
Originally posted by Funko
I know of many people who are "implementing SAP", never heard of anyone who actually completed the job though.

Don't worry, this is me...can be an awkward shit at times but nothing I can't handle...

Resource Consumer
29-11-2006, 18:42:31
Originally posted by Lazarus and the Gimp
That was some years back- I don't work there any more. The views were nice.

damn. And I had bought a USB missile launcher for the secret santa