View Full Version : Puntastic!

Scabrous Birdseed
30-09-2006, 07:07:23
Well, they made me chuckle anyway. Some of them.


1. A bicycle canít stand alone; it is two tired.

2. A will is a dead giveaway.

3. Time flies like an arrow; fruit flies like a banana.

4. A backward poet writes inverse.

5. In a democracy itís your vote that counts; in feudalism, itís your Count that votes.

6. A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion.

7. If you donít pay your exorcist you can get repossessed.

8. With her marriage she got a new name and a dress.

9. Show me a piano falling down a mine shaft and Iíll show you A-flat miner.

10. When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.

11. The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered.

12. A grenade fell onto a kitchen floor in France resulted in Linoleum Blownapart.

13. You are stuck with your debt if you canít budge it.

14. Local Area Network in Australia: The LAN down under.

15. He broke into song because he couldnít find the key.

16. A calendarís days are numbered.

17. A lot of money is tainted: ĎTaint yours, and Ďtaint mine.

18. A boiled egg is hard to beat.

19. He had a photographic memory which was never developed.

20. A plateau is a high form of flattery.

21. The short fortuneteller who escaped from prison: a small medium at large.

22. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end.

23. When youíve seen one shopping center youíve seen a mall.

24. If you jump off a Paris bridge, you are in Seine.

25. When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought sheíd dye.

26. Bakers trade bread recipes on a knead to know basis.

27. Santaís helpers are subordinate clauses.

28. Acupuncture: a jab well done.

29. Marathon runners with bad shoes suffer the agony of de feet.

02-10-2006, 14:44:10
Quick, hide these from funko!

02-10-2006, 14:45:31
These are way above his level, he won't understand them.