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View Full Version : Have you, as an adult, drunk human milk?


Lazarus and the Gimp
01-06-2005, 11:35:21
There appears to be an out-of-date beaker containing 3 ounces of Mrs Gimp's finest boob-juice in the fridge, looking sad and abandoned. Hmmmm....

Nills Lagerbaak
01-06-2005, 11:36:14
I think this is a case where it'd be preferable to drink straight from the bottle

Funko
01-06-2005, 12:01:41
I haven't.

Provost Harrison
01-06-2005, 12:02:31
It's gone 'down the hatch' :lol:

Rodgers
01-06-2005, 12:03:47
I'd mix it into a coffee just in case it tastes nasty - might take the edge off.

Lazarus and the Gimp
01-06-2005, 12:04:10
And proved to be rather pleasant.

Provost Harrison
01-06-2005, 12:05:16
Next time: human flesh...

Funko
01-06-2005, 12:05:45
Too late, I was just about to come back in and suggest you make human milk cheese.

Provost Harrison
01-06-2005, 12:06:40
Originally posted by Starchild
Make a rich blue cheese out of it and serve it to guests at your next dinner party as a delightfully ironic "Soylent Blue".

Spartak
01-06-2005, 12:06:51
Urgh. Have you told your Mrs? Mine would be freaked out if she thought I had been drinking her milk.

Lazarus and the Gimp
01-06-2005, 12:07:55
Hell, she knew what she was getting involved with when she married me.

Funko
01-06-2005, 12:10:52
Originally posted by Spartak
Urgh. Have you told your Mrs? Mine would be freaked out if she thought I had been drinking her milk.

Why? :confused:

Are you lactose intolerant too?

Spartak
01-06-2005, 12:14:30
No she just thinks its gross.

Nills Lagerbaak
01-06-2005, 12:15:32
Just cos she doesn't like the taste. Also why is she feeding it to her baby then?

Rodgers
01-06-2005, 12:21:20
So, what does it actually taste like?

LoD
01-06-2005, 12:21:59
Wanna try mine?

Lazarus and the Gimp
01-06-2005, 12:23:03
Originally posted by Rodgers
So, what does it actually taste like?

Like any other milk. A little oilier and sweeter.

Funko
01-06-2005, 12:23:45
Originally posted by LoD
Wanna try mine?

No thanks.

LoD
01-06-2005, 12:25:37
I wasn't asking you.

Tizzy
01-06-2005, 12:26:20
I think he speaks for all of us though

Rodgers
01-06-2005, 12:26:45
Originally posted by Lazarus and the Gimp
Like any other milk. A little oilier and sweeter.


Is that a 100-0?

Anyway, I'd heard it was creamier if anything, but I bow to your experience.

LoD
01-06-2005, 12:26:52
Holy shit, I've just realised the alternate meaning to that question in the context of males :nervous:.

Funko
01-06-2005, 12:27:14
Isn't that what your last post was about? :lol:

LoD
01-06-2005, 12:28:38
Not intentionaly :lol:.

Funko
01-06-2005, 12:29:10
That's what I assumed you meant.

LoD
01-06-2005, 12:31:39
Yeah, I can imagine it, but it was supposed to be about breast milk, not "man milk".

Funko
01-06-2005, 12:32:20
You have breast milk? I am not sure what's most disturbing.

LoD
01-06-2005, 12:36:29
Own Goal! I don't, that was the point :lol:!

Funko
01-06-2005, 12:36:51
:confused:

:milk:

Provost Harrison
01-06-2005, 12:43:03
"Man milk" means something entirely different in my eyes...

Provost Harrison
01-06-2005, 12:43:26
:lol: I've just noticed how that could be misinterpreted...

Funko
01-06-2005, 12:45:23
Are you LoD in disguise?

Tizzy
01-06-2005, 12:45:34
If it's in your eyes you're doing something wrong.....

LoD
01-06-2005, 12:49:06
Originally posted by Provost Harrison
:lol: I've just noticed how that could be misinterpreted...

:lol:

This thread is a black hole of amusing/embarassing ambiguities!

zmama
01-06-2005, 12:53:25
Originally posted by Spartak
No she just thinks its gross.

:confused:
I think that's weird
:clueless:

Immortal Wombat
01-06-2005, 12:54:18
I think failing to make it into cheese would be a crime against the subtly voyeuristic "science" which makes the internet great.

MDA
01-06-2005, 12:55:35
Not even curious.

Lurker the Second
01-06-2005, 13:01:07
Yaaay for boobies!

Rodgers
01-06-2005, 13:09:42
Originally posted by Immortal Wombat
I think failing to make it into cheese would be a crime against the subtly voyeuristic "science" which makes the internet great.


Could that be a cheese that vegans would be happy entering for the cheese rolling contest?

Funko
01-06-2005, 13:10:37
That is a very interesting point.

What do Vegans feed their babies?

MDA
01-06-2005, 13:18:50
Probably some kind of fortified soy milk.

http://www.solaeliving.com/soyproteinproducts/products/enfamilprosobeelipil.jsp

Lazarus and the Gimp
01-06-2005, 14:15:47
Originally posted by Funko
That is a very interesting point.

What do Vegans feed their babies?

Breast milk or infant formula milk. There have been manslaughter cases brought against vegan parents who killed their kids by trying to use other stuff.

Lazarus and the Gimp
01-06-2005, 14:18:21
Originally posted by Immortal Wombat
I think failing to make it into cheese would be a crime against the subtly voyeuristic "science" which makes the internet great.

I was out of rennet and couldn't be bothered to wait a few weeks/months to make a very tiny quantity of cheese.

If anyone did manage to make a kilo or so, I bet it would go for a fortune on e-Bay. Or they could stick it in a gallery and Charles Saatchi would pay about 100,000 for it.

Funko
01-06-2005, 14:20:45
Lazy bastard.

protein
01-06-2005, 14:20:45
I think there should be a law that kids should eat a healthy balanced omnivorous diet until they are ten. Then they can decide whether to follow in their parent's bizzarro-world insanity diet.

Venom
01-06-2005, 14:21:12
Boob milk is super sweet...Or so they say.

Nills Lagerbaak
01-06-2005, 14:22:15
Only if they grow their own veg organically and hunt and kill their own meat. :D

protein
01-06-2005, 14:23:02
Originally posted by Lazarus and the Gimp
I was out of rennet and couldn't be bothered to wait a few weeks/months to make a very tiny quantity of cheese.

If anyone did manage to make a kilo or so, I bet it would go for a fortune on e-Bay. Or they could stick it in a gallery and Charles Saatchi would pay about 100,000 for it.
Let's do it. We can drug your missus, pump milk out of her, transfer the milk to my attic where I can process it into a nice artisanale style soft camembert with cumin seeds.

Funko
01-06-2005, 14:28:43
If it's supersweet maybe we can make some kind of Human Mascarpone

Funko
01-06-2005, 14:29:34
ps. drugging her would be bad 'cause the drugs would go into the milk and therefore the cheese, or maybe that's a good thing.

Lazarus and the Gimp
01-06-2005, 14:30:27
It could make a nice cheesecake too.

Nills Lagerbaak
01-06-2005, 14:32:33
Imagine the cheese cake! hmmm, I just don't want to know what we'd use for the raspberry layer?!

Funko
01-06-2005, 14:32:53
This maybe a crazy thought but - Raspberries?

Funko
01-06-2005, 14:33:16
(human) milk chocolate cheesecake

Nills Lagerbaak
01-06-2005, 14:33:49
If it's going to be an entirely human cheese cake - I fear not.

Funko
01-06-2005, 14:36:17
Who said it was going to be entirely human? It's just cheesecake made with human mascarpone. Mmmm.

Where would you get the biscuity base layer from in a human?

Funko
01-06-2005, 14:36:56
Let's face it, we want to make a delicious dessert not some disgusting monstrosity from a horror movie.

You've been watching too much Bunman.

Greg W
01-06-2005, 14:38:23
Originally posted by Funko
Where would you get the biscuity base layer from in a human? Oh, the picture that that brought to mind. :lol: :lol: :lol: :nervous:

Nills Lagerbaak
01-06-2005, 14:38:30
Originally posted by Funko
we want to make a delicious dessert not some disgusting monstrosity from a horror movie.




As you would have seen from Bunman, the two are not mutually exclusive!

Immortal Wombat
01-06-2005, 14:47:28
Overbaked placenta. Or pancreas if it's easier to get hold of.

Lazarus and the Gimp
01-06-2005, 14:49:42
Mrs Gimp vetoed having us cook up her placenta. That's probably just as well, because it looked minging. A cross between a pizza and horrible bloody death.

Cruddy
01-06-2005, 15:00:23
Odd but slightly relevant factoid...

... when my old man was doing his national service in Africa/Sudan, the local Dinka's where much perplexed at him putting (dried) cows milk into his tea.

"An animals milk? How barbaric! If you feed that to your children, surely they must grow up to be animals too!"

Different strokes for different folks.

Venom
01-06-2005, 15:14:47
That's why they're stupid savages and we're not.

Cruddy
01-06-2005, 15:17:32
:lol:

It's the "we're not" I have a problem with.

Venom
01-06-2005, 15:19:03
I'm not a savage.

MDA
01-06-2005, 15:43:44
Shut off the electricity for 24 hours and we're all savages.

Venom
01-06-2005, 16:04:18
Twice in my life I've been without electricity for more than 3 days. Once in the summer, once in the winter.

JM^3
01-06-2005, 16:07:15
are we talking about camping/backpacking here?

or living in a hosue without electricity..

Jon Miller

Rodgers
01-06-2005, 16:08:19
And?

Venom
01-06-2005, 16:09:26
Living in a house. So even then I was unsavage. At least until I had to resort to cannabalism to eat and make skin clothing to keep me warm.

Lurker the Second
01-06-2005, 16:11:50
I suppose no electricity is better in winter than summer.

Venom
01-06-2005, 16:13:30
I don't know, you may not lose your food in winter, but god damn it's cold. At least in the summer you can drive someplace else.

Lurker the Second
01-06-2005, 16:20:59
:lol: Your car doesn't work in the winter?

Venom
01-06-2005, 16:30:01
My car works, it's the other fuckheads on the icy roads who don't know how to work their car.

protein
01-06-2005, 17:06:07
Well, as we've got the human cheese bit we might as well do the whole cheesecake with human ingredients.

The fruity topping could be blood clots with a semen glaze and chunks of muscle. The biscuity crunchy bit could easily be ground up and baked skull.

Spartak
01-06-2005, 17:08:00
:vom:

The Norks
01-06-2005, 21:08:35
Laz have you heard of a book called Fermentation? Its about a woman who gets pregnant and starts craving more and more stronger cheeses, as dealt by her local fromagerie, she at the same time has outrageous sex fantasies and it all culminates with the birth and I wont tell you any more. Its very short, maybe 100 pages, but well worth a read

Lazarus and the Gimp
01-06-2005, 22:42:01
I'm avoiding anything with sex in it right now. Enforced celibacy disagrees with me, and I'm afraid any form of stimulus might make me go on a wild and destructive rampage, like a bull elephant in musth.

The Norks
01-06-2005, 22:50:38
have a wank!!