PDA

View Full Version : Fun with lodgers


DevilsH@lo
16-04-2005, 18:44:32
So I went out last night to a party, and I come back today at 5 in the evening to find my front door open, because my lodger has been and gone and not shut it properly. I'm really fucked off, someone had been delivering leaflets and must have seen it open, and I have no idea how long its been open. Nothing is missing but if it had been, the insurance would have been invalid because the door wasnt locked.

So far we've had to kick her door down (breaking both door and lock) because she locked herself in, she's managed to pour orange juice through the ceiling, she's broken plates, leaves tons of crumbs across the entire worktop if she eats and never cleans them up etc. She pays her rent late unless I remind her. And worst of all, she never apologizes for any of this stuff.

FUCKING HELL!!!!!!!!! I just need a rant. She is driving me crazy and now i have to speak to her about the door...sigh....

S_S

Martini
16-04-2005, 18:51:35
Moral of the story: don't get a lodger.

For the money, we're really not worth it :p

Provost Harrison
16-04-2005, 18:53:25
Tell me about it. It is why I live on my own so I don't have to deal with the idiosyncrasies and shit that other less perfect humans have...

Oerdin
16-04-2005, 19:48:46
SS isn't the lodger is she?

DevilsH@lo
16-04-2005, 19:57:26
See what happens when your misses nicks your login.
:D

Spartak
16-04-2005, 20:08:40
Dump the lodger and hget abetter one. I hear the DSS pays good money for putting up total losers.

Qaj the Fuzzy Love Worm
16-04-2005, 20:40:05
How does one pour orange juice through the ceiling? I can imagine it'd be possible in a two-storey, but you'd need a ton of OJ, surely?

DevilsH@lo
16-04-2005, 20:41:14
ok so I just spoke to her and said, the door was open when i got in, to which she said 'it was?' and started mumbling in French to her boyfriend, and then petered out, so I said 'Please can you make sure you lock the door properly on your way out, as people have come by with leaflets and they could have got in'...she said 'yes but it was the first time this happened', so I said 'I need you to lock the door because anyone could have walked into the house' she said 'yes you are probably right' and that was that.

Do the French not know how to apologise or something? I mean if i left someone's house wide open to burglary, I'd fucking say sorry. She barely even looked me in the eye. I am so pissed off right now. I am seriously thinking about asking her to leave and getting a new British lodger who understands what sharing accommodation means (they don't do this in France apparently, and all the houses are bigger and better and everyone is more stylish-ARRRRGH!)

S_S.

Spartak
16-04-2005, 20:43:14
Why don;t you use your own log in or did DH leave his open?

DevilsH@lo
16-04-2005, 20:53:12
i'm locked out of my computer and dont know my password :dunce:

Spartak
16-04-2005, 20:58:17
Have you learned about these new fangled password things you can use to log out one id and logv in another?

HelloKitty
16-04-2005, 21:21:35
Our lodger is great. Old friend of ours and her little daughter.

That poor baby is going to be super confused growing up.

Cruddy
16-04-2005, 23:24:28
Originally posted by DevilsH@lo
So I went out last night to a party, and I come back today at 5 in the evening to find my front door open, because my lodger has been and gone and not shut it properly. I'm really fucked off, someone had been delivering leaflets and must have seen it open, and I have no idea how long its been open. Nothing is missing but if it had been, the insurance would have been invalid because the door wasnt locked.

So far we've had to kick her door down (breaking both door and lock) because she locked herself in, she's managed to pour orange juice through the ceiling, she's broken plates, leaves tons of crumbs across the entire worktop if she eats and never cleans them up etc. She pays her rent late unless I remind her. And worst of all, she never apologizes for any of this stuff.

FUCKING HELL!!!!!!!!! I just need a rant. She is driving me crazy and now i have to speak to her about the door...sigh....

S_S An alternative explanation - somebody is stalking you and left the door open to freak you out.

MDA
16-04-2005, 23:57:44
Originally posted by HelloKitty
Our lodger is great. Old friend of ours and her little daughter.

That poor baby is going to be super confused growing up.

:lol:

That might be worth filming for sitcom TV.

DevilsH@lo
17-04-2005, 00:02:05
Originally posted by Spartak
Have you learned about these new fangled password things you can use to log out one id and logv in another?

That only works if you can remember your password- I usually have my favourites link set up so I dont have to bother with it, and when i changed it once before it kept locking me out. All will be well when my laptop cable arrives.

S_S

protein
17-04-2005, 00:36:03
People make mistakes. I wouldn't start saying stuff like "why can't french people apologise" until she does it for the third time, but then I do stupid and clumsy things all the time so I think its kind of normal.

DevilsH@lo
17-04-2005, 01:36:09
yeah but she NEVER apologises. Ever. I don't mind the odd plate or cup getting broken, thats human, but leaving the front door wide open requires a big fucking apology in my book. Things like this happen all the time, she is a walking disaster area and she doesnt try and put things right- like with the orange juice, I had to clean it up while she vanished off with her boyfriend.

Her attitude may not be because she's French but I cannot help but notice the similarities in attitudes between her and the last French lodger we had , other Frenchies at work etc. Our concept of politeness doesnt seem to figure on their agendas very highly. I was even warned by a French guy at work that they are far more direct in France and dont pussyfoot about like we do in linguistic terms. Thats fair enough, but it grates on me. When in Rome etc

Don't get me wrong, I know irritating housemates can come from any culture, but I hope that if we go for a Brit next time at least there won't be the difficulty of language barrier, cultural differences, different living expectations etc. Most adults here are used to sharing so I think it might be easier if we do some careful selection. She hasnt made any effort to embrace or understand British culture, yet she criticises it alot, and that winds me up.

She does my nut in anyway, and I think she's rude. That may be differing cultural norms or not, or partly that and partly other stuff, but I don't care really, I just want her to stop destroying my frigging house!!

HelloKitty
17-04-2005, 03:45:56
Originally posted by MDA
:lol:

That might be worth filming for sitcom TV.

My three mommies, with Fred McDowell.

Provost Harrison
17-04-2005, 09:52:37
I've never had any problem at all with French people, so it must just be the individuals...

Provost Harrison
17-04-2005, 09:54:53
Did you take a deposit? Remember to make all these deductions from it if you did!

Dyl Ulenspiegel
17-04-2005, 11:19:04
How do you "pour orange juice through the ceiling"?

mr.G
17-04-2005, 11:23:21
open it enthusiasticly?

zmama
17-04-2005, 11:25:23
Go up the stairs, drill a hole and pour the juice?

Greg W
17-04-2005, 11:37:48
That so sounds like the "open the door, put the elephant in" joke, Zmama. :D

Dyl Ulenspiegel
17-04-2005, 12:43:52
Originally posted by zmama
Go up the stairs, drill a hole and pour the juice?

uuuuuh, naughty! :bounce:

zmama
17-04-2005, 12:58:08
My week is made. I need Dyl to call me bad or naughty at least once a week :D

Greg W
17-04-2005, 13:01:15
As long as there's no leather involved.

zmama
17-04-2005, 13:11:10
damn

Oerdin
17-04-2005, 13:12:08
It's no fun without the leather.

Greg W
17-04-2005, 13:17:22
Yeah, but no fun for us unless there's pictures...

DevilsH@lo
17-04-2005, 15:44:22
Originally posted by Dyl Ulenspiegel
How do you "pour orange juice through the ceiling"?

Take one bottle of frozen orange juice, lay it on it's side, wait for it to defrost, the expansion during freezing will cause the seal on the lid to break, and being a clumsy french bird, you won't notice until the people you are living with start getting drips of orange coming through the ceiling.
Then send your boyfriend upstairs to sort it out, while all the time looking completely dumb founded and awe struck that such a miracle could happen.
Then don't bother apologising, just stay out of the way until the worst of 'SS's' wrath has cleared.

She is pretty clumsy and pretty stupid, but then i suppose her mum normally covers all the bases when she is living at home.

The miraculous self locking door was my favourite. :bash:

DevilsH@lo
17-04-2005, 16:20:58
SWEET JESUS!!!

I came downstairs today to find my kitchen is the temperature of a Sub-Saharan sauna because she has left the oven hob on unattended for god knows how long.

The worktops are once again strewn with crumbs from one end to another.

At least her boyfriend has finally buggered off.

S_S

Dyl Ulenspiegel
17-04-2005, 16:28:47
You need an insulated ceiling.

DevilsH@lo
17-04-2005, 16:28:52
Originally posted by Provost Harrison
I've never had any problem at all with French people, so it must just be the individuals...

Maybe- I think it might be a bit of both factors. The British are notorious for apologising all the time, so it obviously ranks higher on our agendas than other peoples which is probably why it grates on me so much that she never says it. To be fair though she actually did say sorry today when I pointed out that the oven had been left on. I could cope with cultural differences if she didnt constantly slate British culture.

As for her as an individual, I think she is just clumsy and weird. She broke a plate and put it back in the cupboard without telling me. Stuff like that is WEIRD. She told me she thought British women had no style and dressed too slutty, and then went through my clothes when I was out (then told me!) and then went and bought identical clothes so that she too could look like a style-less slut. I mean WTF?? Thats not Frenchness thats weirdness. She's a proper mental.

SS

Debaser
17-04-2005, 16:29:56
Time to get a new patio (if you know what I mean...)

http://www.museum.tv/archives/etv/B/htmlB/brookside/brooksideIMAGE/brookside.jpg http://www.bbc.co.uk/radio4/womanshour/media/anna_friel.jpg

DevilsH@lo
17-04-2005, 16:34:19
Originally posted by Provost Harrison
Did you take a deposit? Remember to make all these deductions from it if you did!

Like I say, I'm not too bothered about plates etc because they cost peanuts and its easily done, but I am charging her for the door and lock. I'm also considering giving her back her remaining deposit 6 weeks late, as thats how long it took for her to cough it up in the first place.

:bash:

DevilsH@lo
17-04-2005, 16:39:22
Originally posted by Dyl Ulenspiegel
You need an insulated ceiling.

unfortunately ex council houses are none too solid in their construction- it went through the floorboards and there was a tiny hairline crack in the plaster it came through.

Her parents are here next week :cry:

Spartak
17-04-2005, 17:01:54
get rid. That's my advice.

Lazarus and the Gimp
17-04-2005, 17:02:03
Kick her out. As a live-in landlord, the law is totally on your side.

Spartak
17-04-2005, 17:05:22
World stops Spartak and Laz agree.

DevilsH@lo
17-04-2005, 17:17:29
I know thats what I should do, but she works at my company and I dont want the bad feeling really. She's moving out in June so I think that I might hang on till then. I'llsee what develops though. If I find the door open again she's gone.

Spartak
17-04-2005, 17:19:36
Have you told her how fucked off with her you are - especially the bit about not taking any responsibility for her actions and not apologising?

Chances are she has fucked off everyone in your office with the same attitude and they will all back your side of the eviction.

DevilsH@lo
17-04-2005, 17:31:43
its difficult to know whether she understands. This is why i'm going for a Brit next time- no ambiguity. I've tried to be nice up to now but she's taking the piss. I don't think she's malicious, just dumb. I hate having to talk to her about this stuff because she's so timid and I feel like a bully.

I'm setting the rules down from the beginning with the next one too.

Qaj the Fuzzy Love Worm
17-04-2005, 17:31:47
re: the kitchen, "invite" her down into it and say "Clean it up". Works with m'kids, and if she acts like one, treat her like one.

Spartak
17-04-2005, 17:34:31
What Qaj said and its not too late to reset her expectations.

Qaj the Fuzzy Love Worm
17-04-2005, 17:41:08
While she's working you can exercise the option to give her the "I'm not your mother/we're not your parents. It's not our job to clean up after yourself, if you persist we'll charge you standard janitorial rates and cost of supplies, which will come out of your deposit and raise your rent accordingly." Hey, I dock the kids their allowance when they do a crappy job, I don't see why the same shouldn't apply in your case.

Qaj the Fuzzy Love Worm
17-04-2005, 17:41:44
But then I'm a mean old bastard with impossible expectations and a hair-trigger temper, what do I know? :lol:

DevilsH@lo
17-04-2005, 18:20:10
I think I've scared her a bit now so i'll see how it goes.

Provost Harrison
17-04-2005, 20:33:41
I am inclined to agree with Laz, she sounds like a complete fruitcake and you need to get rid...

MOBIUS
17-04-2005, 20:41:06
When did you scare her, after the wide open front door, or after the oven left on all morning?:rolleyes::rolleyes::rolleyes:

Spartak
17-04-2005, 21:29:03
Sounds to me you don't want to deal with the situation. You clearly have a completely hopeless lodger who is used to living at home and being waited on hand and foot. If you don't tell her what you are pissed off about are you actually being fair to her?

MOBIUS
17-04-2005, 21:33:00
Yeah, you're the new doormat!:p

DevilsH@lo
17-04-2005, 21:58:18
I know I know, I give people way too much rope to hang me with.

I guess I dont want to face unpleasantness at home, plus its really hard to say to someone 'you're a fucking loon' and to do it in a way that you're convinced they've understood.

Spartak
17-04-2005, 22:02:39
Why don't you try being more constructive and "explain" to her nicely why her behaviour might annoy "other" people...

DevilsH@lo
17-04-2005, 22:06:54
I know thats what I should do, but I also think its very hard to explain in pigeon english- its all seemingly unrelated incidents too. She didnt pay much attention when I explained about the door either.

My best friend reckons we should advertise for someone else, tell its not working out and show her the door. I just feel bad because she isnt horrible she's just a clumsy annoying dufus

MOBIUS
17-04-2005, 22:13:21
Treat her like you would treat a pet that has done something wrong...

1) For the OJ, use her face as a mop

2) For the door, slam head repeatedly in doorway until she understands concept of home security

3) For oven, put her head inside so she realises that perhaps it is not a good idea to leave it on ALL FUCKING DAY!

She clearly doesn't give a shit about you or your house...:shoot:

Gibsie
17-04-2005, 22:24:25
You see, as with so much in life, the problem isn't with lodgers, it's with the French.

DevilsH@lo
18-04-2005, 00:35:03
No one likes the French, lets face it. Except French Canadians.

Oerdin
18-04-2005, 00:54:21
How old is she? It could be that she's just a ditsy kid.

DevilsH@lo
18-04-2005, 00:57:32
26 ish i think

Oerdin
18-04-2005, 01:07:26
Hmmm, she must have been an only child or something. Either that or her parents dropped her on her head as an infant.

DevilsH@lo
18-04-2005, 01:15:24
i thought you were in bed DH!!!


Oerdin I think your head theory is about right. The other day she was talking to me from literally the point at which I put my bacon in the pan to fry it, to the point at which I took my clean plate out to the kitchen. She just yapped all through my meal about her boyfriend's job. She also likes doing this the second I settle down to watch a TV programme.

Gary
18-04-2005, 08:14:00
Isn't that normal female behaviour ?!? :confused:

DaShi
18-04-2005, 08:38:01
Next time her boyfriend spends the night, ask to watch.

Oerdin
18-04-2005, 10:11:45
Or you can do what my room mates and I did. If a girlfriend/boyfriend stayed more then five nights a month then they owe a portion of rent plus utilities. People can hang out all they want but if they're sleeping, eating, and showering in the house then they pay for part of the upkeep of the house.

DaShi
18-04-2005, 13:24:04
How will that steadily erode their relationship?

DevilsH@lo
18-04-2005, 13:59:45
Originally posted by Gary
Isn't that normal female behaviour ?!? :confused:

some of us pause for breath, or even try and illicit a response from our victims, we dont just hold our own domestic filibuster while those around us weep.

DevilsH@lo
18-04-2005, 14:01:00
Originally posted by Oerdin
Or you can do what my room mates and I did. If a girlfriend/boyfriend stayed more then five nights a month then they owe a portion of rent plus utilities. People can hang out all they want but if they're sleeping, eating, and showering in the house then they pay for part of the upkeep of the house.

she did offer to pay but I said no because he's come over from France and she only gets to see him rarely. He brought me chocolate and wine last time. Not so much as a baguette this time.

Gary
18-04-2005, 15:21:21
:D