PDA

View Full Version : How to scare someone with the line: don't be alarmed


Drekkus
15-04-2005, 11:11:56
So yesterday evening I went to the fitness, to perfect my godly body. :cute:
Afterwards, I walk to my car, pull out my phone and see that I missed a call. I check and see that it's my g/f, which is really strange, since she knows that I couldn't answer the phone, and she knows what time I will be back. With the baby only 4 weeks away, I start to feel a little nervous. A friend of mine had his daughter 4 weeks early too.
So with a feeling of 'naah, couldn't be, could it' I call her. She answers, and says 'Hi, ehm, don't be alarmed', at which point my heart rate explodes, 'but there's a fire at the restaurant two houses next to ours. Firetrucks in the street, so you have to take another route to get here'
After a few moments of silence I exhaled, really deep, and told her never to say 'don't be alarmed' to me again.

Tizzy
15-04-2005, 11:14:16
It's funny how if you tell someone to do something like that they do the opposite.
Don't be alarmed, don't panic, don't look round.

MoSe
15-04-2005, 11:22:19
Don't panic.
Don't panic.
OK. Panic.

mr.G
15-04-2005, 11:23:41
Don't annoy
Don't annoy

and than mr.G starts posting.

Funko
15-04-2005, 11:44:09
"Could everyone please move sensibly and carefully towards the exits..."

MoSe
15-04-2005, 11:45:05
said the hostess with her chute on

protein
15-04-2005, 11:47:22
:lol: @ whole thread

King_Ghidra
15-04-2005, 11:47:52
ok, everybody, now don't shit yourself

Funko
15-04-2005, 11:49:03
Don't have a cow, man.

Tizzy
15-04-2005, 11:49:33
I've probably posted this before:

It was opening night at the Orpheum and the Amazing Claude was topping the bill.

People came from miles around to see the famed hypnotist do his stuff.

As Claude took to the stage, he announced,
"Unlike most stage hypnotists who invite two or three people up onto the stage to be put into a trance, I intend to hypnotize each and every member of the audience."

The excitement was almost electric as Claude withdrew a beautiful antique pocket watch from his coat. "I want you each to keep your eye on this antique watch. It's a very special watch. Its been in my family for six generations."

He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting "Watch the watch, watch the watch, watch the watch...."

The crowd became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth, light gleaming off its polished surface.

Hundreds of pairs of eyes followed the swaying watch, until suddenly it slipped from the hypnotist's fingers and fell to the floor,breaking into a hundred pieces.

















"Shit" said the hypnotist.

It took three weeks to clean up the theatre

MoSe
15-04-2005, 11:50:33
Originally posted by Drekkus
After a few moments of silence I exhaled, really deep, and told her never to say 'don't be alarmed' to me again.

Because the "fuck the firemen" you'd have spontaneously uttered hadn't you taken few breaths to restrain yourself, could have been horribly misinterpreted... :cute:

Funko
15-04-2005, 11:52:05
:lol:

That's a great joke.

MoSe
15-04-2005, 12:00:01
yea, an always nice classic one (...suckup! :p ;))

mr.G
15-04-2005, 12:02:29
:lol:

Funko
15-04-2005, 12:04:09
Originally posted by MoSe
yea, an always nice classic one (...suckup! :p ;))

I hadn't seen it before. :o

MoSe
15-04-2005, 12:05:38
and at first I had thought you were laughing at my lame pun...
:rolleyes:


;)

Greg W
15-04-2005, 12:22:11
:lol: Hadn't heard that one before.

Drekkus
15-04-2005, 12:35:42
Originally posted by MoSe
yea, an always nice classic one (...suckup! :p ;)) :lol: That's a very subtle way of saying "OLD!", isn't it?

Venom
15-04-2005, 13:18:03
Should I have shit myself reading that joke?

zmama
15-04-2005, 13:18:54
as usual

Greg W
15-04-2005, 13:21:56
She shoulda said:

DON'T PANIC

mr.G
15-04-2005, 13:23:13
well she said: "je moet niet schrikken"

MoSe
15-04-2005, 13:40:24
you might not shriek!

Drekkus
15-04-2005, 13:55:18
Schrecklich!

Spartak
15-04-2005, 15:11:22
Oh sod it

PANIC

Lurker
15-04-2005, 15:18:31
So Drekkus is Leaving Forever in four weeks, huh. Most excellent. One more reason to oppose birth control.

Spartak
15-04-2005, 15:19:14
:lol:@Lurkie...

Drekkus
15-04-2005, 15:22:03
Lurker has it wrong. It's not children (see Spartak, Laz) but marriage that kills posting here (see FunkyFingers, Maroule). Until I get married, you guys are stuck with me.

zmama
15-04-2005, 15:23:03
I'm married

Venom
15-04-2005, 15:24:16
You have, at times, been near invisible.

Rodgers
15-04-2005, 15:24:55
Originally posted by King_Ghidra
ok, everybody, now don't shit yourself


Probably best not to say that when evaccuating a nursing home.

zmama
15-04-2005, 15:26:15
Oh, but that has nothing to do with being married. That's being held prisoner on a german server ;)

mr.G
15-04-2005, 15:27:42
scary very very scary (http://www.big-boys.com/articles/disco.html)

Venom
15-04-2005, 15:28:44
Are you really a prisoner when it's voluntary?

zmama
15-04-2005, 15:29:38
Was that you and Drekkus?

Spartak
15-04-2005, 15:44:43
Can I point out that both Laz and I are also married as is MDA.

zmama
15-04-2005, 15:46:17
Originally posted by Venom
Are you really a prisoner when it's voluntary?

Stockholm syndrome ;)

Venom
15-04-2005, 15:52:17
So you have much lurve for your German overlord.

zmama
15-04-2005, 15:56:40
Only on the days I'm not screaming "you bastard you got us killed!"

mr.G
15-04-2005, 15:58:53
zoooom batzzzzzzz battttttt hoooooooy

Venom
15-04-2005, 16:21:09
Gonna be a cat fight between you and HK.

zmama
15-04-2005, 16:24:40
Nah, she can have im

Venom
15-04-2005, 17:14:04
Suuure. You say that now.