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Lurker
11-04-2005, 15:51:54
There's a damned insane robin that keeps attacking my car. Yesterday morning I went out and it had scratched up the windshield and passenger side windows, not to mention shit all over the car. So I go to the carwash and it turns out some of the scratches won't even come out. I figured it must have been nesting in the adjacent bushes/trees and gotten territorial with its reflection in the windows, so I parked it about two car lengths away last night. This morning, same thing. I think I'll get a cat and tether it to the roof of the car.

HelloKitty
11-04-2005, 15:52:53
Sprinkle alka-seltzer around and on your car.

mr.G
11-04-2005, 15:53:50
call Batman

Drekkus
11-04-2005, 15:55:39
The birds have finally made a pact against Lurker. First the suicide bird in his office, now this. I think the smell is getting too much even for them.

MDA
11-04-2005, 15:57:09
You beat me to the goose comment. :(

Lurker
11-04-2005, 15:58:28
Originally posted by HelloKitty
Sprinkle alka-seltzer around and on your car.

What the hell will that do?

The goose wasn't my office, although I did have to temporarily relocate in that space while they were recarpeting the office.

Provost Harrison
11-04-2005, 16:03:47
Sentry gun!

MDA
11-04-2005, 16:05:25
If they eat Alka-seltzer, it can build up enough pressure to rupture their stomach and kill them. Urban legend?

JM^3
11-04-2005, 16:05:31
I thuoght you were talking about your lunch..

Jon Miller

Oerdin
11-04-2005, 16:11:55
I think that is an urban legend. A bird can burp or fart too I'm sure. My suggestion to Lurker is a pellet gun so you can show that bird who is in the dominante evolutionary position.

MoSe
11-04-2005, 16:22:20
I'm sure a robin roast is much more meat than he can hope to put his teeth on in a normal panhandling week.

JM^3
11-04-2005, 16:24:53
well, there is always mcdonalds out of the trash

Jon Miller

Drekkus
11-04-2005, 16:32:40
Robin Givens?

Lurker
11-04-2005, 16:33:26
I dunno about a robin, but I'd have eaten that goose if someone cleaned it and cooked it.

Funko
11-04-2005, 16:45:15
Originally posted by Oerdin
I think that is an urban legend. A bird can burp or fart too I'm sure. My suggestion to Lurker is a pellet gun so you can show that bird who is in the dominante evolutionary position.

I dunno... someone in the locals pub me and K_G used to go to claimed to blow up pigeons with alker selzer..

Oerdin
11-04-2005, 17:00:56
It seems like everyone knows someone who supposedly did it but if all those people were really doing it as much as they claimed then sea gulls would be an endangered species. ;)

Lurker, it's easy enough to clean a goose. Just boil a big pot of water, hold the bird by the feet, dip him in the boiling water a half dozen to a dozen time of no more then a second or two each time. This will scald the skin and make the feathers easy to pull. Once the feathers are off chop his head off and reach down to pull the heart, lungs, and kidneys. With a sharp knife cut away part of the skin between the legs then give the bird a quick firm shake. The intestines should fall out.

Now it's just wash the bird and let the meat cure a bit so riger mortis sets in and the meat firms up.

King_Ghidra
11-04-2005, 17:07:11
rigor mortis

MoSe
11-04-2005, 17:10:01
at first I was thinking you meant to dip the goose in boiling water ALIVE....

MDA
11-04-2005, 17:35:24
Well, that should still work.

The goose will likely break your arm, though.

Oerdin
11-04-2005, 17:39:17
And all the flapping would splash boiling hot water every where. No, you want to break his neck first and let him sit until he stops twitching.

We killed and cleaned a few chickens and two pigeon while in Iraq. It's not that hard.

zmama
11-04-2005, 23:15:41
Originally posted by MDA
Well, that should still work.

The goose will likely break your arm, though.

:lol: :lol: :lol: