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View Full Version : Michael Jackson poor joke of the day


Nav
17-02-2005, 12:09:25
Jacko was heading off to court with his lawyer yesterday when they had the following exchange:

MJ: "I'm sorry - I'm feeling poorly."

Lawyer: "Who the fuck is Lee and why are you only telling me this now?!"

Funkodrom
17-02-2005, 12:13:22
:lol:

Debaser
17-02-2005, 12:42:38
Don't encourage him Mike.

What is funny though, is that Michael Jackson's defence team are actually calling on Stevie Wonder as a witness. In real life. It isn't a joke.

:eek:

Funkodrom
17-02-2005, 12:45:09
I heard Stevie Wonder had a big row with Michael Jackson and it culminated in Stevie saying "At least I'm not black"

protein
17-02-2005, 12:46:15
Oh the double irony.

miester gandertak
17-02-2005, 12:47:28
Originally posted by Funkodrom
I heard Stevie Wonder had a big row with Michael Jackson and it culminated in Stevie saying "At least I'm not black" I thought it was ray charles

Funkodrom
17-02-2005, 12:49:20
Does Stevie Wonder know Ray Charles?

protein
17-02-2005, 12:52:33
Only by face.

Funkodrom
17-02-2005, 12:53:54
From the A-Team?

Debaser
17-02-2005, 12:58:50
Yeah, Ray Charles was shagging Amy, Face's on/off girlfriend, and Stevie was Face's dad.

miester gandertak
17-02-2005, 13:03:01
yaaaay yaaaay sure, and now you will tell me that mrT is a tv Reverend.

Nav
17-02-2005, 13:03:12
got that joke from popbitch they wrote this about MJ's witnesses...


So Michael Jackson is languishing in hospital,
instead of facing jury selection in court.
Let's take a look at the chamber of horrors
he's lined up to defend him. We're still
hoping to be called as character witnesses...

Liz Taylor - alcoholic/painkiller addiction
Diana Ross - drink driving conviction
Stevie Wonder - what's he going to say -
"I didn't see anything?"
Kobe Bryant - accused of rape
Nick Carter - suspected of beating up
his ex, Paris Hilton
Barry Gibb - known as "Pilly" in Bee Gees days.
Uri Geller - Spoon bender
Chris Tucker - the man that cancer boy accuser
Gavin really wanted to meet through the
Make A Wish Foundation but got Jacko instead.

Nav
25-03-2005, 12:37:43
Q: What's the difference between Arthur
Scargill and Michael Jackson?

A: Scargill hasn't seen a miner's helmet for
twenty years

Drekkus
25-03-2005, 12:40:15
:lol:

Ming
25-03-2005, 12:48:30
A few more:

Michael Jackson first wanted to look like Diana Ross, then a white person, now he wants to be A ROMAN CATHOLIC PRIEST.

I just bought a new car stereo... When you shout out "Soul", it plays soul music. When you shout out "Rock", it plays rock music. Some kids ran in front of my car, and I shouted "fucking kids!", and it played Michael Jackson.

Q: What does Michael Jackson call a circumcision?
A: Foreplay.

Q: What did Michael Jackson say to Lorena Bobbit?
A: "SILLY Bobbit! Dicks are for KIDS!"

Greg W
25-03-2005, 13:21:48
Originally posted by Nav
Jacko was heading off to court with his lawyer yesterday when they had the following exchange:

MJ: "I'm sorry - I'm feeling poorly."

Lawyer: "Who the fuck is Lee and why are you only telling me this now?!" I must be feeling a little dutch (and ain't the Dutch happy about that), cos I don't get that joke. :clueless:

jsorense
25-03-2005, 13:23:23
own goal :p

Ming
25-03-2005, 13:25:10
Originally posted by Greg W
I must be feeling a little dutch (and ain't the Dutch happy about that), cos I don't get that joke. :clueless:

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

MOBIUS
25-03-2005, 13:45:47
Q: What's Michael Jackson's favorite nursery rhyme?
A: Little Boy Blew.

If you play thriller backwards, you can hear Michael confessing all the names of the boys he touched. That's why it is 14 minutes long.

Q: What do Michael Jackson and Dr. Spock have in common?
A: They both know how to rear a child.

MOBIUS
25-03-2005, 13:46:52
Q: Where's Michael going on holiday?
A: He's off to Tampa with the kids.

Too easy...

Drekkus
25-03-2005, 13:48:22
Originally posted by Greg W
I must be feeling a little dutch (and ain't the Dutch happy about that), cos I don't get that joke. :clueless: Poor Greg :D

Ming
25-03-2005, 13:49:06
Q: What psychological problem does Michael still suffer from?
A: Anal retention.

Q: How is Michael now?
A: Feeling a little crotchety.

Q: What was the big break in the Michael Jackson molestation case?
A: A doctor did a rectal exam of one of the boys bringing charges and found
... a white glove.

Q: What is the most difficult thing to get out of little boys underwear?
A: Michael Jackson's makeup!

Spartak
25-03-2005, 14:38:43
What does MJ have in common with McDonalds?

They both like to put meat between two buns.

Greg W
25-03-2005, 23:56:36
Originally posted by jsorense
own goal :p No, I REALLY don't get that joke! It makes no sense at all to me. :bash:

jsorense
26-03-2005, 00:11:44
100-0 insurance

MJ: "I'm sorry - I'm feeling poorly." [I'm feeling poor Lee]:rolleyes:

Greg W
26-03-2005, 00:14:57
Ah! :clueless:

No beer and no TV make Greg something something...

"Go Crazy"?

Don't mind if I dooooo
di
doooooo

jsorense
26-03-2005, 00:19:42
Thank you jsorense for beeing nice and smart. :rolleyes:

MOBIUS
26-03-2005, 00:21:45
I have those too...:(

Greg W
26-03-2005, 00:22:00
It's schmart!

And the sun's gotta shine outta every dog's arse one day... :p

jsorense
26-03-2005, 00:26:34
Originally posted by Greg W
It's schmart!

So you are dutch after all.:hmm:

Greg W
26-03-2005, 00:28:17
I told you, I'm feeling a little Dutch. Girl I hope, but they could be man breasts...

MOBIUS
26-03-2005, 00:30:50
Originally posted by jsorense
Last edited by jsorense on 26-03-2005 at 00:22

:p

Greg W
26-03-2005, 00:33:38
Originally posted by jsorense
Thank you jsorense for beeing nice and smart. :rolleyes:


Last edited by jsorense on 26-03-2005 at 10:22
And even then he couldn't spell "being" right. :p

MOBIUS
26-03-2005, 00:35:16
Yeah, but he did fuck up my impending crap joke about sore knees...:shoot: