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Martini
20-01-2005, 22:01:47
I am not drunk.

I cannot drink. This is a disaster.

I need an alternative to getting wasted.

Now.

Japher
20-01-2005, 22:03:58
get stoned

Martini
20-01-2005, 22:05:10
I have nothing to get stoned with :(

zmama
20-01-2005, 22:05:57
Learn to knit

HelloKitty
20-01-2005, 22:09:31
Fact Sheets - Short-term alternatives to drinking

What is an alternative?

Using an alternative is a survival skill which can help someone delay, prevent or even stop their usual impulse to drink, use drugs, gamble etc.

The purpose is to distract yourself from one behaviour you are wanting to change by doing something else instead.

For some, finding the right mixture of alternatives, coupled with supportive counselling can help reinforce the commitment to a goal and lead eventually to maintaining lengthier periods of behaviour change.

A particularly strong desire or craving to drink alcohol (which is a mood-altering drug) usually only last for only a short while. During a craving it feels as if the craving will go on building up until it becomes unbearable. This is not true. The intense craving can pass after as little as 15 minutes to up to one hour. In the meantime you are 'at risk' from giving into your habit. This is the time when using a number of alternatives

* can become a vital life-line,
* could prevent an episode of unwanted drinking, and
* will help you learn how to break the cycle of drinking in the long-term.

Alternatives need to be realistic, achievable, cheap, enjoyable and easy to do, and most importantly they must work for you. The alternatives that you use may or may not totally get rid of that feeling of wanting to drink, but they may help you to cope well enough until the craving passes, and with less damaging consequences to your self and others.

Here are some alternatives to drinking that other people have found useful

* Phoning a friend/the Samaritans/Drinkline
* Going to a support meeting
* Visiting a friend
* DIY
* Having a cup of tea or coffee
* Eating something
* Treating themselves eg to ice-cream, a cream cake, chips, a curry etc
* Having sex
* Cooking
* Doing some exercise, running, going to the gym etc
* Taking the dog for a walk
* Painting, writing, drawing
* Doing some gardening
* Doing a crossword/puzzle/jigsaw
* Reading a book or magazine
* Playing a game
* Using the computer
* Following a relaxation exercise
* Having a relaxing bath or shower
* Listening to music (maybe turned up loud!)
* Dancing
* Watching TV or a video
* Praying or visiting a place of worship

HelloKitty
20-01-2005, 22:10:41
Or just follow this link (NSFW) (http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=gay+porn&btnG=Google+Search)

jsorense
20-01-2005, 22:10:58
Exercise until you pass out.
Takes me about 5 minutes. :bounce: :bounce: :bounce: :sleep:

Martini
20-01-2005, 22:12:02
Originally posted by HelloKitty
Or just follow this link (NSFW) (http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=gay+porn&btnG=Google+Search)

:lol:

KrazyHorse@home
20-01-2005, 22:12:05
* DIY

This generally makes me feel like drinking more

* Taking the dog for a walk

Is this a euphemism?

HelloKitty
20-01-2005, 22:12:08
Or try out this

http://members.aol.com/bj022038/

HelloKitty
20-01-2005, 22:13:08
Originally posted by Martini
:lol:

IT WORKED!

protein
21-01-2005, 00:22:00
Have you considered valium or heroin? In small doses they have a similar effect to alcohol but are less harmful.

HelloKitty
21-01-2005, 00:23:47
He doesn't need any more ideas. He followed my link and has been busy ever since.

protein
21-01-2005, 00:29:12
I thought he was a she.

HelloKitty
21-01-2005, 00:35:57
Keith is a she?

protein
21-01-2005, 00:38:36
I can guarantee it ain't keith, unless he has a laptop with a wireless connection.

HelloKitty
21-01-2005, 00:39:15
Is he locked in your closet?

Martini
21-01-2005, 00:42:38
I am defintely not Keith.

protein
21-01-2005, 00:42:54
Yes. Oh, and another thing, Keith is dead.

I ate his liver.

Shcschlurp.

jsorense
21-01-2005, 00:57:40
Originally posted by protein

I ate his liver.
If this is true protein, then you should go to a hospitlal and get your stomach pumped.
Just think about what has passed through that thing.:nervous:

protein
21-01-2005, 00:59:41
It's okay, the fava beans will have ... urk... I feel sick...

HelloKitty
21-01-2005, 01:00:25
I always thought Martini was an overused AE. So are you all saying Martini is a real person?

protein
21-01-2005, 01:03:30
Dunno. It ain't Keith though, he was at the gig.

Hmm. I always thought Martini was a girl and the timing of his/her posts lead me to believe he/she was British.

Whoever he/she is, I like her/his posts.

HelloKitty
21-01-2005, 01:08:30
I always thought Martini was a Walrus AE, but since he is gone...

Hmmm

protein
21-01-2005, 01:15:35
Walrus was a far- right, all-american, pro-guns and hunting, pro-war type of guy wasn't he? Maybe before my time?

I thought Martini's posts were convincingly British and female.

Dunno, I'm drunk and should be in bed. Let me know when it's all figured out.

Immortal Wombat
21-01-2005, 01:21:45
I'm convinced she's real. I just can't figure out who she is though. All Polyed out? Yet female?

Nice to see that userID 666 wasn't completely wasted though.

HelloKitty
21-01-2005, 01:21:52
Yes he was, from the start of ACOL.

He also pretended to be several women over at SAAN and flirted with MikeH when Koshko and I posted looking for love ads for Mike.

He was a funny guy.

HelloKitty
21-01-2005, 01:23:23
Originally posted by Immortal Wombat
I'm convinced she's real. I just can't figure out who she is though. All Polyed out? Yet female?

Nice to see that userID 666 wasn't completely wasted though.

I never paid her threads much attention and alsways assumed they were throw away AE threads.

Martini
21-01-2005, 06:10:13
For fuck's sake, I'm a real live British female with no other ID on this site. If you cant accept that then...well, i don't really give a shit to be honest.

The Mad Monk
21-01-2005, 06:54:14
Chocolate.

Provost Harrison
21-01-2005, 10:05:55
Originally posted by Martini
For fuck's sake, I'm a real live British female with no other ID on this site. If you cant accept that then...well, i don't really give a shit to be honest.

Whatever Keith. I don't believe you got the chance to sneak off to the internet cafe last night, I never noticed...

Gary
21-01-2005, 16:35:52
Originally posted by Martini
I am defintely not Keith. *EVERYONE* is Keith

MOBIUS
22-01-2005, 01:10:43
I am Keith!

Lazarus and the Gimp
22-01-2005, 08:33:40
Have you considered screaming obscenities until little sparkly dots start swimming across your field of vision?

zmama
22-01-2005, 09:30:21
I've never considered that...but it may be my new hobby

The Mad Monk
22-01-2005, 09:43:47
Did that once back in September. I still have slight double vision in my right eye. :(

zmama
22-01-2005, 09:45:45
Wow, a professional!!!

Lazarus and the Gimp
22-01-2005, 09:50:17
You swore until you made your eyeballs rupture? I'm genuinely awed.

The Mad Monk
22-01-2005, 10:08:52
Just one, and it had been acting up all day. I think I just pushed it over. Two days after, a vessel broke on the surface and half the eye was blood red for a week.

Oerdin
22-01-2005, 15:12:50
I hear hallucinations can occur to people who are on the verge of dying of dehydration so maybe Martini could try that.

Martini
22-01-2005, 15:25:17
Now that does sound enticing.....I've been awake nearly 2 hours now and havent had any fluids yet, so I think I shall give this dehydration thing a go.

Darkstar
23-01-2005, 06:19:36
I'm surprised no one has linked this thread to the study that shows that drinking non-alcoholic beer reduces the chance of cancer.

Japher
23-01-2005, 06:21:21
bs

I can link anything ot reducing the chance of getting cancer

Darkstar
23-01-2005, 06:35:31
So everything reduces cancer? Cool. I need to do more of everything then.

Japher
23-01-2005, 06:41:48
exactly

HelloKitty
23-01-2005, 07:51:55
Killing yourself reduces the chance of cancer to nil!

MOBIUS
24-01-2005, 00:15:08
So... If I kill myself...

Oerdin
24-01-2005, 00:18:28
Life is a sexually transmitted disease with a 100% fatality rate.

miester gandertak
22-02-2005, 18:50:49
wow deep and all

Martini
22-02-2005, 18:56:29
Ooo, wow, someone bumped one of my old threads! Yay!

(and also reminded me i had failed to give up alcohol again....thanks for that)

Funkodrom
22-02-2005, 18:59:28
Give up giving up.

Martini
22-02-2005, 19:07:53
I have, definitely. People always used to tell me 'just don't give up' - time to take their advice :D

Oerdin
22-02-2005, 20:25:30
I have never seen anyone skull fucked before.

Funkodrom
23-02-2005, 09:36:46
I assume that was in the context of a deleted image not a proposition for Martini. :)

Basically - I think if your user name is an alcoholic drink giving up is a bit unlikely.