Gears of War Review
16/11/06 by Venom
I hate this review and I know you do to. I think Iíll wind it up. But firstÖ.More rambling! From me, your intrepid reviewer! Or is that insipid? One of the two. A big vocabulary is the first sign that youíre a pompous asshole.
Thereís a lot more that I could say about this game, which is a testament to its quality. Letís finally wrap this thing up. While a very, very good game, even great at times, Gears of War is definitely no Halo killer. Itís got the eye candy, even at 720p, to make you drool like a brain damaged janitor with no tongue and Retropharyngeal abscess and the 3rd person view also does a good job of taking you further into the game with its camera angles and movement. However, the storyline never quit gets fleshed out and you are left essentially chasing a McGuffin and killing the big boss. Thatís not exactly original. Honestly though, this game doesnít need much of a plot. You're here to kill. And Gears delivers on that. Youíve got intense combat, great co-op and multiplayer, and great graphics. Oh and did I mention you get to chainsaw bad guys? In the face? Yeah. Thatís likeÖ.awesome.
Final Score: 93%. Thatís right. 93%. I switched my scoring method. The letter grades were giving me school flashbacks. Congrats for making it this far. Oh, and Sierra, you god damn devil bastards. I still hate you.